Which disney princess always stays old? Snow White

Two Mexicans were sitting in the back of a car. They were carpooling to save gas.

The foreskin of a baby gorilla

Why did the turtle fall out of the car? It forgot to buckle up

What's the difference between your wife and the kitchen? One is a living organism

your momma so fat.... that as she walked by....... i missed 3 commercials

What did the little boy get on christmas morning? Cancer.

Wanna hear a dirty joke....? A pig rolling in mud!

What did the unicorn eat for a snack? Nothing. Unicorns are a majestic fiction animal.

Did you hear the one about the pizza and the salamander? Neither did I.

How did the marines cross the minefield safely at night? Under a full moon

What do call a someone with no arms, legs, and has an eye patch? Names

why did the boy drop his icecream?? he got hit by a bus

How do you eat an Elephant? Elephant meat is most palatable after roasting in a 450 degree oven for 2 hours. Garnish with carrots and broccoli.

Why is evan a lil poop? cause he pooped my poop all the pooping ;)

I have read the terms and conditions

Why did the baby cross the road? Because I took a swing at it with a golf club.

What's the difference between a Jew and an apple? One of them is a fruit, and the other is not.

Why was the woman angry with Santa Claus? Because he kicked her hands.

Why couldn't timmy brush his hair? He had leukaemia

Why did the beautiful woman marry the ugly poor old man? She was blonde & was therefor not aware that he wasn't rich nor younge.

why are black people so good at sports? hard work and dedication

Are you still trying to turn me on or something? Well its not not working. Anyway, what is yogurt? So I am eating dead bacteria here? Ifs so strange I feel like I have known you my entire life.

CAVE JOHNSON.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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