What do Whitney Houston and Selena Gomez have in common? They are both dead. Exept for Selena Gomez..

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MR MR WHO?? MR MC CANN

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Why did the chicken cross the road Why? Because his house was burning down on the other side

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I need a way to meet local babes and get ripped in 4 weeks. Shame there aren't any popularly advertised methods of doing that around here...

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Why did sara fall out of the tree? -she had no arms.. Knock knock. -who's there? not sara.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house..... knock knock! whos there? THE CHICKEN!!

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hello

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dallen loves penis

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What's black and white and red all over? A butler with a stab wound.

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Why was the boy sad? I don't know, what do think I am? An umbrella? Why would you even think FOR A MOMENT that it's OK to just ASK me random stuff? Do you have ANY IDEA who I am?! I'm your worst nightmare, and if you ever ask me ANYTHING without permission again, or so help me I will drown the nearest pet goldfish. P.S. His cat died.

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing 'cause you done told the b i t c h twice!

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What's blue paint and smells like red paint? Paints

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Q-what did the bus say to the other bus? A-nothing, buses are incapable of talking

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Why was Martha put in a wheelchair? She was hit by a rabid cabbage.

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What did the Mexican, the European, and the Canadian all have in common? They weren't used in this joke the last time someone posted it on anti-joke.com.

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An Asian man walks into a bar and ask the Barman for a beer, the Barman is racist and therefore tells the Asian man to leave his pub. The man goes home and drowns his children in the bath and pushes his wife down the stairs, he is found out by the police and is given a life sentence in jail. 5 years later the Barman kills someone in a bar fight and is also sent to jail for life. The Barman meats the Asian man in prison and they settle there differences with a handshake. Two days later the Barman was stabbed in the neck.

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Who has two thumbs and gets to go home tomorrow? Well, not your son. He's in a persistent vegetative state and we had to amputate both of his arms.

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Whats worse than 1 bee sting? 2 bee stings,whats worse than 2 bee stings? The holocaust Whats worse than the holocaust?.. 3 bee stings

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Why couldn't the young african american read? He was born blind

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Why couldn't little Jimmy see his mum in the crowd? Because he was blind.

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what did the postman say to the dog, nothing he doesnt speak dog....... but his mother in law does.

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A muslin walks into a bar, and has the same equal rights as everyone else and orders a pint of fosters.

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What Would George Washington say if he were alive to day. why are all the slaves free?

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why did the chicen cross the road? because it saw an excellent deal on hair products on the other side of the street.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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