Why did the chicken cross the road? Being a chicken, it had no concept of roads or their dangers and was simply trying to find some feed.

A man walked into a bar. He was meeting his friends but was 30 minutes early so he went down the road to buy some food. He had recently began dieting after watching a series of lifestyle programs which informed him of the potential risks involved with high cholesterol and blood pressure levels. He purchased a garden salad and a freshly squeezed orange juice, and made it back to the bar in time to meet his friends.

How did the black man start his car? He turned on the emission and lightly leaned his foot on either the accelerator or reverse pedal, depending on the position of the car.

How do you get santa to stop delivering presents? Kill your parents.

What's worse than finding a worm in ur Apple? Finding a worm in ur poop

What do you call a deer with no eyes? A shocking example of the cruelty suffered by animals at hands of humanity.

Why did the male propagate the female? Because he was drugged. Slyly, this foxy female had slipped the male the date rape drug and a dangerous amount of viagra. During intercourse, the male ripped a gaping hole in the female's stomach and killed her. He woke up confused inside a dead stinking corpse.

A boy asked his dad Why are Chinese eyes like that. His dad replied there concentrating that's why there so smart The boy went up to a student in his class and said look I'm like you The teacher asked who told him that he said his dad The dad was called up by the school when the teacher told him what his son did he went GOOZILLA His wife asked him what he was up to and he said farting on her face when she was a sleep 3 days later he found out his wife was cheating on him he knocked on the door only to realize he was on drugs and that he never had a family.

What smells like smoke, sounds like a pig, and looks like a horse? My mom's boyfriend

How do you teach another person's son to ride a bike? You don't. Let his real parents teach him to ride a bike.

Q: Why are black people so tall? A: Not all black people are tall, and if they are it is probably from their specific genes.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Joe Bereta is a member of al Qaeda.

rocky is here again.......................

How do Mexicans like their eggs? It's a matter of personal opinion, of course.

Why did the boy fall of his bike? He's learning to ride and understandably lost his balance.

What did the Chinese man say to the Japanese man Nothing as they have never met

What is the difference between a fridge and a tree ? The fridge can't sing

whats worse than 10 babies in a blender 1 baby in 10 blenders

Why can't Sally use the swings? Because she has no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there?? ... Not Sally.

A man loses his wife in a car accident He then fall into a deep depression then hangs himself.

A princess decided to kiss a frog in the hopes that it would turn into a handsome prince, as she found none of her suitors to her taste. The frog was incredibly poisonous and she died of total organ failure three days later.

What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a woman? Intercourse.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house?!?! Neither has he

You're American when you enter the the bathroom and you're American when you exit the bathroom. What are you while you're inside the bathroom? Using the bathroom.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...