Q: What did Peter say after a long day of work when he got home? A: Nothing, in fact he has job, home, family, or anyone to help him. His leg is pinned down by a large piece of metal that fell on him while looking for food to eat at a construction site, expect him to die of bleeding in the next 24 hours.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave Smith. Oh, hey Dave. Come in.

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why am i a dick head. because my gcse's spelt fudge and i dont like fudge so i project my anger into boss things

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A rabbi and a nun walk into a bar. They grab a drink and really hit it off despite their differences. After a couple years of happy dating, the rabbi, Mark, preposes. Gloria, the nun, gladly accepts. After four months, Gloria is pregnant. She dies in childbirth. The child has many illneses and dies within a week. Mark commits suicide.

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What is worst than 1 baby dead in a microwave? 2 babies dead in the same microwave !

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thats the same sound ur mom made in bed last night

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whats white jizz

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How did the blind man escape the mugger? He ran into a bus.

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Roses are red Olives are Black come to my and will smoke some crack

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A Russian man walks out of a bar looking very sober because he walked out of the bar sober.

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What do you call a Jew in the oven? The oven repair man

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Q. What did the mockingbird say to the blue jay? A. I mock you by mocking you

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What did the biological child say to his adopted sister? We are both loved equally by our parents.

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How man people does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1 an electrician

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One sux, the other is decent. But supporting the sucky one shows u are dedicated.

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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Why was Timmy strong? Because his dad injected steroids through his asshole.

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How do you make a baby stop screaming? Pour acid down its throat.

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Why don't sharks attack lawyers? Professional Courtesy

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why are black people scared of chain saws? because it goes runnigganigganiggarunnigganigganigga

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What did the Nazi Death Camp Guard say to the escaping prisoner? - Nothing. He shot him in his face.

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what is brown and sticky? a stick.

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"Ask me a question." "No" "Cheese" ... "What?"

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Knock Knock Who's there? Orange Oranges can't talk therefore this is not a accurate accusation.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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