Why did little jimmy fall off the building? 9/11

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Wilson: would you buy lottery when you grow up Mattuew: no theres no point Wilson: ask Xiangxi right next to you Mattuew: xiangxi, would you buy lottery if you grow up? Xiangxi: Prabably not, because the chance of winning a lottery is lower than becoming an astronaut Mattuew: the probability of you winning the lottery is higher than you finding a girlfriend

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A man walks into a bar and wakes up in the hospital with a mild concussion.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being raped by a Triceratops.

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Why was the blonde sad? Her phone was broken due to an NNEMP.

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Why are Chinese women such bad drivers? Only company executives are fortunate enough to own cars in communist China. Furthermore, women are still in a subordinate class in many Eastern societies.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? I don't know, you answer the door.

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What's up? Not the Twin Towers.

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What did the woman with a terminal illness get for Christmas? A diagnosis.

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Why are some people so barbaric? Because some people are German.

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Knock knock Who the fuck says knock knock?

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k

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You still alive? I used to be called proteus by the way, but then you disappeared and Neronism or watever its called now turned insane. I mean we killed you man! Out of mercy, you telling me a jacket changed you and everything? Where have you been? Six million followers? And all the shit that has made "moral man" the most lauded thing on Horsehead is you? Mind helping me make sense out of all of this?

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What do you do when you're surrounded by 15 vampires and 15 werewolves? Stop pretending.

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Yo mama's so fat, I gave her a compliment because we should embrace body acceptance.

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K O O K A B U R R A . . . . . . . . . . ReTweet

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why was the little boy happy? Because he wasn't in the penn state locker room.

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What's red, white, and blue? light purple

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A man walks into the bar. It was typical day and nothing interesting happened.

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no rasist joks

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Simon says why the hell are we playing Simon say!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

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how to you confuse a blonde you ask her to recit the alphahbet back words

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Roses are red, Violets are Violets. Screw this poem. Potato.

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Why did the ship get lost at sea? The captain was a piece of bread.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops