what is black and blue and hates sex? the ten year old in my trunk.

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What do you get when you mix 5 bottles of beer, a bottle of vodka, 3 glasses of red wine, and 15 jello shots? Alcohol poisoning.

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How did the black man get a car? He bought it.

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Q:How come we have a black man in th white house? A: because we elected him

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What do you get when you cross a man, with Alzheimers disease?

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How fast do Jews cook? It depends how many you have in the oven at once.

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Weed.

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What did one man say to the other? "hi other man"

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Why was the snowman afraid of the sun? Because he would melt that day and die

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Whats less comfortable than a metal bench? The trunk of a car when you're being abducted.

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A White, a Mexican, and a Chinese guy all take a boat to go exploring.

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Casey Anthony kills a baby

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A man walks into a bar. There is no one there.

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Hey diddle diddle, the cat and the fiddle, the cow jumped over the moon. It burnt up on re-entry

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Q: What do dogs and wind have in common? A: They're both blue. Except the dog. Or the wind. Wind is colorless.

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Hey do you know who is in the yard? Not the boys, they all died in a horrific fire last Christmas.

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A man walked into a bar. Ouch! He stepped on a piece of a shattered bottle from a bar fight. Don't worry, though, it was just a little cut and he felt fine after a few beers.

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What do you do if there's a black guy bleeding on your lawn? Help Him

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A man walks into a bar, little did he know it was a gay bar and a few of the regulars were drinking and got overly aggressive the unaware man was then forced into the bathroom and raped by the aggressive gay lovers

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How many armless people does it take to change a lightbulb? I dunno, that's why I asked you... Hello?

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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Yo mamma's so fat she has her own zip code!!! :) Well... the actual reason is she is filthy rich and her house is so big that it takes up a bunch of room, and now that im talking about her i really wanna be her even though shes fat!

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Knock, Knock... Whose there? panther panther who? panth-er no panths im goin' swimmin'

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs going down a mountain? A: As good as dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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