What's worse than having to tie one of your shoelaces after walking 5 miles? Getting a 56 year old mixture of blood, urine and sperm injected in your asshole.

Why did Sally drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally

why did the mexican choose to work as a landscaper instead of at taco bell? landscaping pays much better and was a more practical decision in this economy to support his family of 13.

Knock, knock. Now before I asked "Who's there" I first opened the door as then I can see who's there without having to ask them through the door.

What did Tom get for his 5th Birthday ? Nothing, he died when he was 2 years old

Two hippies walk into a bar. They are both asked to leave because they are in violation of the 'no shoes, no service' policy.

knock knock whos there? police police who? police your house is on fire and your kid just died from broncitisand i just farted and u get a tickit because u answered the door naked

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 6 went to a house party. 7 was there. 7 and 6 kind of new each other. They went to the same school, but weren`t really friends. All night 7 was giving 6 strange looks. 6 started feeling uneasy, so he left the party early. When 6 got in his car 7 was inside waiting for him and pulled out a gun. Luckily 6 got away from 7 safely, but has been scared of him ever since.

The elephant moonwalked. On the moon.

Why did you laugh at this joke. Because it was funny.

what is red white and blue? the french flag

why are black people so fast? because there black

Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet And this poem sucks

Why did the koala fall of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the other koala fall off the tree? It was stapled to the first koala.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it doesn't have the capacity for rational thought and decision-making and was subsequently hit by a car.

Knock knock? Who's there? Interupting Doctor? Interupting Doc... You have cancer

what's worse than 24? 6 million.

what did the farmer say to the cow on the roof? get down.

What is worse than getting stung by a wasp? Getting raped by a sexually frustrated bear.

why did the roof cave in? It was not structurally sound do to poor architecture

What happens when a plane with 2500 people on board crashes? There were only 165 seats.

You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't eat your friends Nose it is!

What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A scholarship to a prestigious college that he did not deserve.

Why did the man start vacuuming his neighbor's floor? He had to get the GSR

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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