What is three times more dangerous than war? Three Wars.

Like does not mean said. You can blame Justin Bieber for that one, cuz he was like "Baby Baby Baby" and I was like "no"

Knock knock. With the invention of doorbells, knocking has become almost obsolete.

Why did the man write with a pen on paper? Because he was writing a novel.

What happened to the boat that sank? Everyone on it died

Q: What's the difference between a black man from San Diego and a white man from Miami? A: They live in different cities, and in the presidential election, the black man voted for Obama and the white man voted for McCain

Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

An Irishman walks into a bar he asks for directions, and leaves.

Kony 2012 - Uganda Be Kidding Me

How do you make an apple puff? Put the apple in a large pan with some water. Cover and cook gently for 20-25 minutes until soft. Add sugar and nutmeg to taste. Transfer to a bowl and leave to cool. Cover with pastry and bake until well-risen and golden.

Why doesn't the fat kid have any friends? Because he is fat.

i have a pet duck, when i take it a bath i use cold water, if i use hot water it and i drop a carrot in the tub it will think im cooking it.

When does the ice cream get thrown at the yellow horse on thursday evening? Purple Monkey Rainbow

A cockroach walks into a bar. The bar seems to have a pest problem.

Who's the fastest kid in AA

what happend when 3 white guys and 3 black guys try out for a basketball team? They all made it because you need 5 people on the team and it is good to have an extra person on the team in case some one gets hurt, fouled out, late for the game or dies.

What happens when you throw a red rock into a blue ocean. The rock gets wet.

Stephen Hawking walks into a bar

A Irish leaves and bump in to a really tall the Irish sorry boss

Why did Hitler kill himself? He realized what he'd gotten himself into and became severely depressed

what did the lion tell the jellyfish? nothing, both lions and jellyfishes cant talk, and even if they could the chances of a lion meeting a jellyfish are remote

What is small, black and has 18 legs? A centipede with 82 legs cut off.

A man walks into a bar. It leads to a fight that is enjoyable to watch.

A Brunette, a Redhead and a Blond all jump off a cliff, which one will hit the ground last? Since the acceleration of gravity is 9.8 m/s they will all hit the ground simultaneously and with enough force to completly shatter their bodys making body recovery extreemly difficult. They must have had a hard life.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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