Guy 1:Whats the difference between a towel and toilet paper? Guy2: I dont know Guy : SO IT WAS YOU!

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Racist Math Ahmed is on a train from D.C to New York the train is traveling at 125 mph. the distance between New York and D.C is 250 miles. How many will die in the blast.

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A man walks into a bar and notices a twelve inch tall man playing a small piano. He asks the bartender about it. The bartender explains that the pianist has worked there for some time, mostly performing on weeknights. The bartender also tells the man that he may be suffering some vision problems, as the pianist is about 5'8" or 5'9". Some time later the man visits an optometrist and finds out he has a severe case of astigmatism.

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Q: Why did the boy cross the road? A: Because he was getting chased by a pedophile

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What do you call a man with no arms and legs? An amputee

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People with Alzheimers will not remember this joke

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Where did the duck hide its pail? UNDER THE STAIRS!!

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Why didn't the boy's parents throw him a birthday party? Because his father is in jail for drug possession and his mother is dead.

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Who didn't allow the gorilla into the ballet studio? Whoever was in charge.

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Roses are black. Violets are black. Everything is black. I'm Helen Keller.

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What's wrong with black people? They tend to make mistakes, as do all humans

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Why can't Tommy ride his bicycle? Because Tommys' bike has a missing pedal.

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How much does a dead baby weight? the same amount when it was alive!

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because he didn't have arms.

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Your moms so dumb that she has cancer..... wait thats racist

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Why didn't Katie cross the road? Because she's dead.

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You're in the middle of the ocean and you see a roller coaster. What color is the penny? Tree.

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Whats red and black and has 8 legs? 4 dead african babies.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? because he raped her

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What do your friends have in common with a tree? They both fall down when you hit them multiple time with an axe

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Why did the boy drop the ice cream? Because he had a seizure.

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What is the difference between Switzerland and Sudan? One is in Europe the other is in Africa

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A guy wearing a top hat walks into a bar. He says, "Ow."

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Q: What do you get when you put an ice cube, a grasshopper, a cell phone battery, and a human finger in a freezer? A: A very strange mix of objects indeed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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