what do you call 3 mexicans in the back of a car? Carpooling to work to save on gas.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Hi

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why couldn't the bartender sell alcoholic beverages? He got fired

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What happens when a women becomes pregnant? She gives birth to a child 9 months later.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Knock knock. Who's there? Quetzalcoatl. Quetzalcoatl who? Quetzalcóatl, Mayan name Kukulcán, (from Nahuatl quetzalli, “tail feather of the quetzal bird [Pharomachrus mocinno],” and coatl, “snake”), the Feathered Serpent, one of the major deities of the ancient Mexican pantheon. Oh... hi.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Your mother is overweight. This is largely due to her sedentary lifestyle.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's the difference between a guitar and a fish? Fish are living organisms and guitars are instruments used for people's entertainment

thumb_up thumb_down -10

whats worse than the holocost, nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A blind man walks into a bar----b wire

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A seal walks into a club. The poacher continues to beat the seal to death.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Two guys walk into a bat, they have a couple drinks then go home, one crashed and died in a horrible drunk driving accident. The other, who took a cab, went home and viciously beat his wife.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's yellow and shark infested? Shark infested banana pudding.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

If quizzes are quizzical, then what are tests Testicals

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Two fish we're in a tank.. Yup.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you do when you find a blonde on her knees? Help her up, because obviously she has fallen.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do cows and grass have in common? They both say "moo", except for the grass.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why Did the man Commit suicide? His body used cellular respiration to make ATP (A form of energy) and his body used it to send electrical signals to his index finger to pull the trigger on his .357 Magnum, thus putting a bullet through the soft tissue in his brain causing his body to shut down Imediately!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the mum scream at the boy? Because he was being stupid

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Do you know why i dont write poems Because i thought that violets were violets OTARTS...WAS...HERE

thumb_up thumb_down -10

I am hot he is not can you beleive it I got shot

thumb_up thumb_down -10

what did the homeless person get for Cristmas? nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops