Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your mum is dead, Just fucking with you! Kelvin Yang.

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I once shot an elephant in my pajamas. I suffer from a debilitating sleep disorder.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting your balls chewed off by a rottweiler.

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A black man walks into a bar. He paid his tab and couldn't have been more polite.

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knock knock who's there? hope

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On Wednesday night, a drunk man was walking on the cliffs of dover. his funeral was saturday.

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There was a bunch of kids on a bus. One boy yelled "Look a squirrel!" Nobody saw it because he's dyslexic

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a man walked into a bar. the bartender asked why he was annoyed. he answered " people keep on telling this joke and I'm tired of the making me get drunk

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If God created the world, including man kind, why do we worship him? We are corrupt, selfcentered, animal slaughterers. He made us this. So, Why?

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If a man dies in China, Does anybody care?

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Why did the pumpkin when orange is not a letter in Spanish? Because moon shoes are der milf

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What's grey and doesn't climb trees? A car park.

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Ashton Kutcher meets a fine cougar at a bar and the cougar fatally wounded his throat.

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Why did helen kellers dog committ suicide? You would to if you had massive clinical depression.

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Whats worse than cold feet? getting your feet chopped off.

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What do you call something green and fuzzy? Grass, I lied about the fuziness.

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Why didn't jimmy get to eat his ice cream? Because he got hit by a bus

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So there were two... sigh... I hate my life....

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A baby seal walks into a club. It is eventually beaten to death and eaten.

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A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

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A frog hops into a bar. The bartender asks "What can I get you to drink?". The frog hops out and the bartender realizes he is talking to animals because he has anxiety issues and all of his friends leave him and he spends every night crying and waiting to be loved...so he shoots himself.

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weston cage

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Q: What is better than sex? A: A relationship where you can be completely intimate with your partner

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Q: What did the mute kid say to his mother ?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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