Q: IMAGINE that your in a heart racing battle with a huge grizzly bear when suddenly a bird picks you up and carries you to china and leaves you on the adge of a cliff which then you are chased by warriors and are forced to jump off the edge. What do you do? A: Wake up

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What's better than "Friday" by Rebecca Black? Hitler's kill/death ratio

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why did sally drown cause she was black

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Your under arrest for drug trafficking and possession of illegal firearms. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say...

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Q: Why was the balloon scared of unicorns? A: Buses dont exist therefore the balloon was just insane.

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Whatever you do in life, give 100%… unless you’re giving blood.

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If monkeys ate trees, than what would trees be made out of? No one knows because that will never happen.

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A seal walks into a club.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme Others just don't

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Why did the man read the terms of service? He had ignored them before, and was forced into a scam where a shady organization took all of his money and possessions. With no other way to provide for his family, the man began selling drugs, which led to several arrests. He has been n prison for 3 years now... His wife has left him for one of the man's close friends

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A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I'll serve You, but don't start anything."

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Canadians

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Q: Whats worst then losing your wallet? A: Giving birth to a dead baby.

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Q: What does a giraffe say to the other giraffes? A: Nothing, giraffes do not have vocal cords and are therefore unable to make any sounds, much less speak; not to mention a giraffes brain is far to underdeveloped to talk in a spoken language.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie...

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Why was the black man tired? It was 3 AM, and he just came back from his demanding job as a surgeon.

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Why did the guy get glasses? So he could get his dick into the vagina.

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What has four wheels and flies? A flying car.

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Q

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate you, Die.

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You will NEVER guess what just happened!

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Q. If you have 4 pencils and I have 7 apples, how many pancakes can we fit on the roof? A. Purple because aliens don't wear hats.

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Sally has no arms. A: Knock kock? B: Whose there? Not Sally.

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Roses are red, Bacon is also red. Poems are hard, Bacon.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops