In Soviet Russia, man doesn't walk to the bar. The bar walks to the man!

A guy went to a girl asked if she wanted to have sex with him. She said yes and they promptly had sex.

What do you call a person with a cane? someone with a walking disability

Knock Knock. Who's there? Nazi Nazi who? I am the mailman. I nazi your mailbox. Can I leave the letters on the front porch?

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side which would be a incontrovertible (obvious) decision.

So the man goes to the doctor and the doctor tells the man " you will have to quit masturbating " So the man asks " why" And the doctor said " so I can examine you "

How many jews does it take to- I have alzheimers

what do you call a million black people on the moon? a good start

What's the difference between a 7 year old boy and a 50 year old man? Hair.

An american family is picknicking on the bottom of the ocean. They are eating french fries, big mac's, chicken mc nuggets and drinking coca cola, some slurpies too, all purchased at the local mac donalds near lyndon blvd, in chevy chase near that weird house with the toothless lady that always smiles and then all of a sudden frowns at you, often wearing either a dark green or mint green dress. Spongebob squarepants comes drifting by dead in circular pants and little Sally, their youngest daughter asks a question, which cannot be heard because they're underwater.

what happens when you put Rihanna and Chris brown in the same room? Rihanna dies

the more I study the more I know, the more I know the more I forget, the more I forget the less I know, why study?

anus

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Where's Stevin Hawkins? He went for a walk.

How do you get a baby in a bowl? You put it in.

Knock Knock Who's there? Bob Bob who? Your neighbor

What's black and white and red all over? A nun that was stabbed to death.

Roses Are Blue I Have A Gun And Ill Sout You!

a horse walks into a bar the bartender says "why the long face?" the horse does not say anything because its a horse and horses cannot talk.

deez nuts

A Norwegian, a Swede and a Dane where having a bet on who could swim the furthest without getting wet on their hair. The Swede could have done better... The Dane did surprisingly well. The Norwegian, being bald, was disqualified. Moral: I still have some hair left!

Jennifer Kim... having a boyfriend!

Your mom is so fat that her Body Mass Index is 30,?which is considered obese, she should really try to lose some weight.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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