What did the Norwegian say to the Englisman? ØLølølølÅæåøåæøåæåæåæåæåæåæåæå

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Your momma is so fat, she should be concerned about her increased risk if a heart attack because of her poor eating habits.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A man walks into a bar so how many Jews were there when a man called Wellard ate a pizza. Balloons

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why is the redneck crying? They died of diabeetus.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why was the man upset? His entire family was murdered, skinned, separated into assorted body parts, and stapled to trees.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

rofl lol, the joke below me has made my computer offer to translate this page. It thinks it's in Spanish

thumb_up thumb_down -9

women's rights

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call a man in front of three trains that have explosives tied to them and that are making amazingly loud noises? An idiot who obviously can't identify danger and probably had a childhood injury that cause his life to be ruined forever most likely cause by an evil uncle.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Two monkeys are sittin in a bathtub. The first monkey says to The second, "HEY! pass the soap." The second says to the The first monkey, "DUDE. thats not soap, its a typewriter!!!!"

thumb_up thumb_down -9

what is white on top and black on bottom Society What is black on top and white on bottom Rape

thumb_up thumb_down -9

a man goes for blood check up ..........his whole hand was frozen >>>>the doctor cuts his finger'''''' he comes outside crying n sits in a chair n cries.............]]]]]] the person near him asks him why is he cryin...he says i came 4 my blood test the doctor cut my finger.the person next to him cried aloud......the person asked y r u cryin>>>>>>>>>>i came her 4 my urine test ..........????????lol

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Two Naked men jump off a cliff. Three months later, an entire pack of Cub Scouts were enrolled in group therapy. It's ongoing.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why does Charlie Sheen do cocaine? Because his father was a poor role model and he's an unstable celebrity.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

You're so black that other black people make fun of how black you are.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's good about having alzheimers? You meet new people every day!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was a banana.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why was the boy sad he ate a loaf of bread? Because ducks ate him alive after that.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why do seagulls live by the sea? Because they wouldn't be able to live anywhere else.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Roses are red, violets are blue, your face is so ugly it belongs in a zoo, but dont be sad, i forgot the rest, so you wont feel really bad. I need a rhyme, treasure chest.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

why did jenny get 22 turnovers in a basketball game? because jenny has down syndrome

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A rooster is standing on top of a pointed bird house. He lays an egg. Which side does the egg fall, the left or the right? I don't care, I'm a vegetarian.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Q. Why did the car break dance? A. I dont know!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops