What's grey and doesn't climb trees? A car park.

a man walked into a bar. the bartender asked why he was annoyed. he answered " people keep on telling this joke and I'm tired of the making me get drunk

So there were two... sigh... I hate my life....

A black man walks into a bar. He paid his tab and couldn't have been more polite.

On Wednesday night, a drunk man was walking on the cliffs of dover. his funeral was saturday.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

Whats worse than cold feet? getting your feet chopped off.

If a man dies in China, Does anybody care?

Ashton Kutcher meets a fine cougar at a bar and the cougar fatally wounded his throat.

What do you call something green and fuzzy? Grass, I lied about the fuziness.

knock knock who's there? hope

I once shot an elephant in my pajamas. I suffer from a debilitating sleep disorder.

Why did helen kellers dog committ suicide? You would to if you had massive clinical depression.

There was a bunch of kids on a bus. One boy yelled "Look a squirrel!" Nobody saw it because he's dyslexic

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your mum is dead, Just fucking with you! Kelvin Yang.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting your balls chewed off by a rottweiler.

A baby seal walks into a club. It is eventually beaten to death and eaten.

Why didn't jimmy get to eat his ice cream? Because he got hit by a bus

Why did the pumpkin when orange is not a letter in Spanish? Because moon shoes are der milf

When life hands you lemons you can't make lemonade, Sugar and Water are two other key ingredients that were not included with the lemons.

Q: What is better than sex? A: A relationship where you can be completely intimate with your partner

JAMIE STEGMAN IS A MASSSIVE DERP Jess Pots. YOUR A NOOB

What happens when you cross a porcupine, a beaver, a duck, a go-cart, a dinosaur, a star, a cheap "Big 'n Beey" bathroom, and the cookie monster? Justin Bieber. XD

A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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