The closest I've been to an animal charity was when I walked past it to by myself a fur coat

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Just so you are warned here folks, some of the jokes down here are really nasty, like you know... Antijokes... But luckily you got my family friendly stories about sex, incest, panties, grenades, dripping Meows, yeah... Regular family show stuff... IT HAPPENS TO US ALL! Right? Please tell me right? Riiight? Right? Yes? Phew, okay, for a moment I actually thought you where gonna tell me I was normal...

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A man stops another man on the street in Manhattan and asks "How do I get to Carnegie Hall ?" The other man gives him direction, including which subway stop to get off at.

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Why did the dog have no legs? Because its previous owner had cut them off.

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Why did the little boy stick a fork in the electrical socket? Because he wanted to escape his abusive stepfather

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Why do mexicans like tacos? Because tacos are a very well liked food and they happen to taste good

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what did the Nazi do when his Jewish rabbit died? silly Nazi rabbits don't have religion

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What happened to the fat japanese guy? His house was destroyed by the earthquake.

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What do you call a man who tripped on a rock? A man who tripped on a rock.

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What's black and white and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

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What happens when a drunk driver meets a stoned driver? A head on collision

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says,"Why the long face?" The horse replies,"I have terminal cancer."

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There's 2 black guys in a car. Who's driving. Probably one of the 2 men.

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My grandma has this joke where she says "knock knock." I say "who's there?" She says "I can't remember" and starts to cry

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If the Trojan Horse was a deadly deception, is it My Lethal Phony?

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how do you wake up a black man? scream!!!!!

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What's black, white and red all over? A nun that's just been shot.

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Why couldn't the skeleton cross the road? Because it was dead, thus incapable of independent movement.

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Why did everyone die in the world? Its 2012.

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I'm rick james bitch

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what did eric foreman get for christmas? a foot in his ass.

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A janitor walks into a bar. He cleans the bar.

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Comes a giraffe on a scooter to the hospital and asks: 'can I have some flour?'.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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