A bear walks into a bar, and says "I'd like a gin... and tonic." The bartender says "AAAAHHH! A BEAR!!!" and calls animal control. Later after the beast has been tranquilized and carted away, he rationalizes having heard the bear speak as trauma-induced hallucination.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, This joke is stupid, Chuck Testa.

I had 99 problems Solved them all

Do you know why I'm bored???? No why are you bored Because I am

A man walks into a bar, but it's really not his fault because his seeing eye dog led him right into it.

a group of mormons walk into a bar... just kidding mormons aren't aloud to drink.

these are shit

what do you call a rich, gay guy from Florida? Iron man

Chris Bosh's neck

Your mom is so fat that she has to wear larger clothes than the average person.

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

My friends new nickname is hawk-eye! He is a jackass...

Why did little Tommy eat an apple? Because he was hungry. Thats why.

What did the the girl say to the deaf boy after he asked her out? He doesn't know

Where does Charlie Sheen Shop? Winners

What happens when a leprechaun refuses to give you his pot of gold? He doesn't give you his gold.

a blond walks in to a post... OUCH

this girl and guy were sitting on my couch turns out its my sister and her boyfriend and she just farted

What do you say when you see your tv floating at night? Drop it, nigga!!

Whats black and white and read all over? A dead magpie.

Two muffins are in the oven They didn't say anything.

How do you get a fat man to go outside? Blow up his house

A man was feeling sick and decided to go and see a doctor. He saw the doctor and then went home. He wasn't feeling any better so he decided to get checked-out by the doctor.

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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