Roses are red, Violets are blue. I got a baseball bat can i talk to you ?

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Q. whats red and sits in a hairdressers? A. a baby getting its hair cut with a potato peeler

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Where can I apply for janitor school?

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What's yellow and shark infested? Shark infested banana pudding.

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Is a tomato a vegetable? Depends if it is comatose.

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What's good? Anything that is not bad.

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When geese fly in the V formation why is there always one side longer than the other? Because theres more geese on that side.

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How can you tell if someone is a virgin? Everyone is a virgin in something. For example, if you never had sex with a dinosaur, then you are a virgin at dinosaur sex.

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Why don't gingerbread cookies have souls? Cookies don't have souls.

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Whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesnt scream when you put it in the oven!

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Jeff: Did you know, someone called you an owl? Billy: Who?

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a kid was running across the street. he just got hit by a truck

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- Why an Asian crossed the road? - Because he wanted to.

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Why was the little African child sad? He had recently been denied an education only 4 days after witnessing his mother being raped and cut in half by a machete. ....he also had aids. ......and was in Africa.

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What do you call a giraffe without a neck? Dead.

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what did the cashier do when a Mexican robbed the store? call the police

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Why did the chicken commit suicide? To get to the other side.

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A group of cows boarded a spaceship and was launched into orbit around the Earth. It was the herd shot around the world.

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Which of the following is the reason the Titanic sunk. Select all that apply. A. Iceberg B. No radar C. Late warning D. Put your hands on me Jack E. This ship can't sink F. Over by the bed, the couch G. God himself can't sink this ship Z. All the above X. None of the above Q. Why are you still reading

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue If You Bend Over Some More I'll Eat That Booty Too

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I was gonna smack jakes titties...but michael was already doing it....:/

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Why couldn't the T-Rex give anyone a high five? Cuz he's dead.

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Q. What did the monkey say to his little brother? A. Nothing. Monkeys are physically incapable of speaking, therefore it is impossible for them to communicate using the human language.

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oh whatever donald trump's not going to be president. stop pretending he is

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops