What did the policeman say to the man robbing the bar? Stealing is wrong. Then the police read the man his Miranda laws.

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i have alzheimer's, so i forgot the punchline to this joke

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Whats he difference between a rock and a dead baby? I'm not spemding the rest of my natural life in an insane asylum for eating a rock!

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A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

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http://www.pollsb.com/photos/o/355988-gay_marriage.jpg

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yo mama is so fat that a kid said to her ' The White Buddha Has Returned'

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender say, "Sorry, we don't serve your kind here." The man continues to order a drink when he realises the comment was directed at the elephant standind behind him.

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Jimmy can't drive the tractor. Why can't Jimmy drive the tractor? Because he's a patato

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I'm going to Re-write History... History

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a man walks in to a bar. he says oww.

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why couldn't jonny ride on a swing? he had no arms or legs why didn't jonny have any arms or legs? he's a potato!

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a convicted rapist.

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What's old and wrinkly? old people

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what do kids take their lunch in to school. that depends if they buy lunch at school... otherwise they bring it in a lunchbox...

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You are so down to earth, and never confuse that with "simple minded".

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Why don't lesbians use dildoes? Because they look just like a big penises.

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Science fact: what would happen if you lined up all the veins in your body? You would die.

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whats black and hangs from my tree a plum

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A horse walked into a bar and ordered a drink. It was nothing out of the ordinary because the Everett-Wheeler interpretation of quantum mechanics is correct and he lived in a parallel universe in which the roles of humans and horses are reversed.

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whats worse than the smell of nail polish? burning jews.

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Did you hear the one about the deaf guy and the rhinoceros? Neither did he.

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A father was driving with his son. The Son asked " have you been in a car accident in the past 10 years"? The father replys " did you know you HAD 4 siblings"?

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven's dad owned a shot gun.

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What do fat kids and whales have in common? Ruth burden

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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