An American, a French man, and Jew were all in an airplane about to skydive. Their skydiving instructor comes out and says, "I'm sorry, there seems to've been a mistake and we only have two parachutes." The company refunds them, and they, while reasonably disappointed, agree to reschedule the lesson.

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A black man, a white man and an asian man jump off a building, which one will land first? Due to the equivalence principle, they will all land at the same time.

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What do you do when a hispanic man takes your wallet? Ask him to please give the wallet back to you

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why did the baby fall down the stairs? i pushed it.

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What happened when the young child fell off of the swing? He broke open his head causing him to be sent to the hospital for 3 weeks.

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What is the difference between Chuck Norris and a frog one wears pants and the Chuck Norris doesn't.

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What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot!

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- Why Justin Bieber can't login to Facebook? - Because he forgot the password.

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Have you seen stevie wonders new piano? No Well it's really nice

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George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

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What happens when Lord Voldemort tries to kill Harry Potter? He is unsuccessful.

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How do you knock a clown off a swing? Hit it with an axe multiple times.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread!

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so a guy walks into a bar, he says nothing for he now has a concusion

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Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, and the very next day, I died because I didn't have a heart.

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What did one alligator say to the other alligator? Ear

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What do you tell a women with two black eyes? Nothing, you've already told her twice..

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How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie-roll center of a tootsie-pop? zero if you bite it

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knock knock Dave's not here.

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Whats the first thing you do when your grandmother gets hit by a toaster? Buy a new toaster.

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What did the boy say 9+9 was? The Holocaust

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What's worse than dropping your ice cream? The Holocaust

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Whats Pink and fluffy? Yellow fluff thats been dyed pink :D

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I needed to write an article about heart disease so I did some research. I learned a lot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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