Whats green and gets you really high? A green airplane

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Micheal Jackson walks into a bar

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What do you call a alcaholic walking down the street..... Roadkill

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What's worse than finding ants in your kitchen? A truckload of dead babies.

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Why did Justin Bieber bieber his bieber? Because Bieber biebers his bieber when his bieber need a bieber bieber. BIEBER

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What happens when you finish a bottle of Sprite? You finish it

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Why do babies have soft spots? The skull of a baby is made up of skull bones, and in the places where the bones meet there are soft spots made up of a strong cartilage to allow the skull to grow with the baby's brain.

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Why was the five-year old lying in the middle of the sidewalk? Because he was dead.

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What does the Post Office have in common with a shoe store? Both provide goods and services in exchange for money.

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The queen having a shit

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what is the coolest thing in the world? hashtag swagbag yolo

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whats the differnce between a cadilack and a pile of dead babies? theres no cadilack in the back of my car1 >.>

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What does a gay horse eat? Other gay horses.

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust.....

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What do you do when a taco eater gives you guacamole? Thank him, and politely smash it in the face of the nearest trashy tourist.

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Whats the difference between a man and a cat. There both different species.

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why did the girl moan in pain? she got punched in the face.

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whats hard long and has cum in it cucumber

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If u read thus your awsome .... And if your a emo kid with rainbow hair and a 3 inch penis then NO your bad

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Why did the blonde fail her drug test? She's actually never did drugs before but since she didn't show up for appointment, that counts as an automatic fail.

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1 I've been diagnosed with-- 2 I don't give a f*ck, go die in a hole!

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Why did the chicken crose the rode? Because there was a 10 foot scorpion chaseing it

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In Soviet Russia, man doesn't walk to the bar. The bar walks to the man!

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Two girls are backpacking in the Sierra Nevada. They walk 8 km from their base camp at a bearing of 42 degrees. After lunch, they document the wildlife they have seen because they are tracking the populations of species native to the area. Then they continue on their hike, but this time at a bearing of 127 degrees. After 5 km, they reach their destination for the day and set up a temporary camp.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops