Roses are red So are you Cause you killed my dreams So I killed you

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What did the black guy who was lost in Syria say? "Where am I?"

thumb_up thumb_down +23

why couldn't the boy talk? Because he was dead

thumb_up thumb_down +23

what do you call a black man that killed somebody? a murderer.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Knock knock Fuck off!

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Knock Knock Whose there? Ben Dover Come in

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do you call somebody who can't walk? Handicapped

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Biggest lie in America: Sorry, that was my last stick of gum.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A man goes to the doctor. The doctor says "You have to stop masturbating." The man says "What, why?!" The doctor says "So I can examine you."

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Colloqiual irregularities are a significant part of the English language, and excellent example of this is between can and may.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A young cow died of terminal cancer; he said moo before he died

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse answers, "Because I'm an alcoholic."

thumb_up thumb_down +21

what do u call a lesbian with long hair? a long haired lesbian.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

why cant dinosaurs talk? because they're all dead

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Brandon Bass's career average for assists is 0.7 a game. guess what his nickname is bassy

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Midgets' mouths are perfect height for, kissing other midgets.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Wanna hear a clean joke? I took a bath with bubbles. Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is the girl next door.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A black man, a jew and a muslim walk into a bar. ... I forgot what happens next, so let's just say they have a good time and get back home safely.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Jack and jill went up a hill to get some water. Jack fell down, twisted his ankle, and continued to roll. He broke his spine and collar bone and he was later taken to the hospital. Later that night he died because the doctors couldn't do anything. Jill then killed herself in mourning.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What starts with P and ends with "oop" POOP

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What did the brick say to the wall? Nothing, as they are both inanimate objects that lack knowledge and the sense to speak.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A man is talking to his friend. The man suddenly picks up a banana. He says "hello anybody there?" The banana says "yes." After a while of conversing, the man suddenly puts the banana down in a sad type of way. The man then says to his friend "I'm sorry, but your sun has just died in horrible accident.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why is it bad to have 10 blond girls in a closet at the same time? The closet is a very compacted space and one of them is a claustrophobic.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops