What to you call a heavy person, Someone overweight

What comes after 69... Mouthwash

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Ice cream rules kids are great how thinks of this? Michael Jackson

What looks like a horse, but smells and has feathers? A dead horse with a pidgeon in its ass.

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme Others just don't

Q. How do you kill 5000 flies? A. Slap a afraican in the face.

What did the man say before he killed himself? I am going to kill myself

Why couldn't people tell the difference between the two twins? Because they were indentical.

friends are like onions when you chop them up you cry but when you throw them out of a window, you dont

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpion

I don't often drink beer, but when I do, I make the poor decision to attempt to drive while intoxicated, kill a pedestrian, and end up in jail with a hangover, a DUI, and an account of vehicular homicide. Don't drink and drive simultaneously.

How did the guy survive the plane crash? He didnt, He died like everybody else.

Whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew. The pizza doesn't scream in the fire

A man reaches to grab a womans chest and then realizing hes gay, backs off and everyone goes home happy

What looks like a rainbow but isn't seen in the sky? A drawing of a rainbow

Why did the vulture cross the road? To get to the pile of dead babies left over from the Holocaust.

What's grey and can't fly? A castle

Rebecca Blacks walk into a bar. She gets shot.

Q: What did they call the dude who was stuck on a deserted island? A: Incontinent.

Q: A giraffe fell in a hole and died. Which was taller the Lion or Giraffe? A: The Giraffe was before it died

Why couldn't John play soccer? Because he was arrested for being black.

Your face

Why are black people scared of chainsaws? Because the chainsaws go run nigga nigga run.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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