What's worse than the Holocaust? Voldemort

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Ammy Winehouse walks into a bar Don't you said we should stop jocking about dead people ?

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? - "Where's my tractor?"

thumb_up thumb_down -12

why did the Mexican shoot himself? because his wife miscarried, hung herself, and his oldest brother had cancer. also when he was 5, his parents died in a car accident, leaving his abusive uncle to care for him. he also had erectile dysfunction which caused him severe pain. did i mention he was an illegal, homeless immigrant who was addicted to methamphedimine and owed several million dollars to a man who repeatedly raped him anally? he was.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A blond, brunet, and redhead were stranded on an island. With in a week they all died of starvation.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? having your limbs scliced off with a chainsaw and being put in a cage to get mauled by a Mutant Man-eating horse.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's the difference between a man and a woman? Generally speaking- biology, except in cases of transexuality.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What happened when the black man tried to cross the road Nothin. He tripped on a bug trying to get on the edge

thumb_up thumb_down -12

800000000000000000?0?00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000?0000 I hate you

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A man wearing dark sunglasses walks into a convenience store with a dog on a leash. He goes to the middle of the store, and he starts swinging the dog around over his head by the leash. The store clerk comes over and asks, "what are you doing?" The man replies, "Ajiohskdcojqpowuskncvlkzb" Not knowing what else to do, the clerk calls 911. It turns out the man's name is Ruprict, and he has escaped from the local mental institution. A police officer shortly arrives to bring Ruprict back to the hospital.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why can cats jump so high? Cats leg muscles are different then ours. They work kind of like springs that build up energy and then release suddenly. Its kind of like a budgie cord. This gives them the ability to jump so high. If humans were built the same way, they could easily jump up on a one-story roof.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

a blind person walks into a deaf person and the deaf person says "dadadader"

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you call a guy with no legs and no arms? Mat.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

John: what is blue and goes blub blub Phil; I don't know, what? John: a blue blub blub. What is green and goes blub blub Phil; a green blub blub John: no green blub blubs don't exist, what are you stupid?

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How do you drown a blond? You hold her underwater.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

dry handjob

thumb_up thumb_down -12

what does a beer and a priest have in common? They both are cold refreshing beverages, except for the priest.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Jack and Jill went up the hill To fetch a pail of water Jack fell down and broke his crown and Jill called the paramedics

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How do you make a gorilla stop chasing you? You shoot him.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you call double A's? Batteries

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q: How many electricians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: 1, idiot.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the dead baby cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

you suck

thumb_up thumb_down -12

what Did The Cow Say To The Chicken, Moo

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops