roses are blue, violets are unicorns, this poem doesnt make any sense. refrigerator

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A: Why are black people so good at sports? B: Practice and determination.

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If Jimmy had 5 apples and his brother had 5 apples then their father would have been married to their mother before they were born.

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Yo mama so ugly... she has an extremely bad burn on her face.

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Jesse gets back at people who takes his job, by trying to get with their sloppy seconds.. Emphasize trying.

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Why is the ground wet It rained

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What did the straw say to the other straw? We are both straws just kidding they cant talk

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What do you call a muslim flying a plane? A pilot. WOW your racist!

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On a scale of 1 to 10, how high are you? Very.

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Why did Anti-Joke.com close down? It didn't. If your reading this, the site is fully operational and up to date with your system.

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What do you call a smart phone that doesn't want to work? The first conscious phone ever

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Knock knock ? Who's there ? Ipe Ipe who ? You sick !

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Jesse likes to jack off and lick the white stuff off of his balls and digest it

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So a cat a dog are in a field.The dog then proceeds to eat the cat and take a nap

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mommy mommy! why are we pushing the car over the cliff?! the mom answers shhh youll wake your father...

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Why did the blonde commit suicide? Because she hated her life.

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What's worse than a broken leg? Two broken legs

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Up High. *high fives* In The Middle *high fives* Down Low *high fives* In the Grass *high fives* You've been diagnosed with prostate cancer.

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Whats worse than getting shot in the foot? Watching each member of your family get shot in the foot.

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What do you call a jew in an oven? A safety hazard

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What's the hardest part of eating a vegetable? Putting her back in the wheelchair

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A man walks into a bar with his dog. He orders 14 shots and proceeds to drink. For each shot he takes, he feeds one to his dog, who accepts it willingly. The bartender says "Well I've never seen anything stranger. Why did you order 14 shots, and why are you giving half to your dog." "Well," says the man, "my 14 year old dog was diagnosed with a fatal heart condition. I cannot afford to put him down, so the shots should kill him." The dog then dies.

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Why did the woman stop running? She was an escaped convict that had been on the run for twelve years and the police had finally found the place where she was hidding. Upon arriving at her house she started to open fire on the three police cars, hit two cops and killed one more. The two are fine and are going through physical therapy as they were both hit in the spine and have a difficult time performing the smallest task. The one was one called billy. Billy had died in the hospital after asking if they had got her. He died believing a lie. They never got her. She is still on the run, I lied about her stopping.

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how do you make a cat get out of a tree you shot it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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