Why don't pineapples grow on pine trees? Because they're tropical.

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What looks like a lion, sounds like a lion, and feels like a lion? A lion Ba dum chh

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What did the faggot say? Nothing, he shot himself due to high school bullying and rejecting parents.

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A blonde just got a call from her boyfriend. He said i'll meet you at your house, so the blonde drove home, excited. Once the blonde got home her boyfriend was having sex with another girl. The blonde burst into tears and pulled out her gun then stuck it to her head. " No dont do it!" her boyfriend said!...... the blonde, not knowing what to do next said, " Shut up you cheater you're next!"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because animals walking across a paved street is a very common occurrence ever since the industrialization of the modern world.

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Why did the imagrint cross the road? Cuz he stole the chickin's job.

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When Hitler was a girl she had hyjenical warts and when she got older she had beast cancer.

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What do you call 100 Americans at the bottom of the ocean? A US submarine crew.

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Listen Nero, you consider us like friends too right?

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yes i can connor, this is brett.

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Basically copying you.

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What was the strangest part about meeting a girl called Suzie? She had arms.

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A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

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Johnny Manziel is the best quarter ever (this isn't a joke just a true statement)

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Knock knock. "Whose there?" "Dave" Oh alright Dave, two seconds I have got to unlock the door~looks for and finds keys and unlocks door~ Hello Dave, sorry mate not been out yet so not been out, come in.........

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? The answer is not definitive and involves several factors including the size of the woodchuck, the woodchuck's teeth, the climate in which that woodchuck lives, and the tenacity of that particular woodchuck at achieving his goal.

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why is six afraid of seven? because six is a rapist

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i lost the game

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knock knock! who's there? Jim Jim who? Jim Goldenbach

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What do grass and deer have in common? They're both green I lied about the deer

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What do you call a man that's very angry? A Very Angry Man.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Jokes about the Holocaust

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Dave: Knock, knock Steven: Come in.

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How do you drown a blonde. Put a scratch 'n' sniff at the bottom of a pool.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops