Why was the boy walking in circles? One of his feet was nailed to the floor...

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Why did the black guy love his new shirt? Because it was 100% cotton

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What's one very bad way to injure yourself? Smashing your head against a metal surface

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap ...in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations])That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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What would you find if you shaved chuck norris's beard? A chin.

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what do you wear at a funeral? white. lol jk black

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What's small and doesn't turn girls on? A bottlecap.

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- Mom, you have a banana in you ear. - Son I can't hear you, I have banana in my ear.

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Q: What do you call a gay dinosaur? A: Mega-saur-ass

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why'd the chicken cross the road It didn't, it was safely placed inside a chook house

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What is red and has no legs? Half a baby.

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What's the difference between Neal Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neal Armstrong was the first man to WALK on the MOON, while Michael Jackson enjoyed touching young boys.

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Your dad isn't gay...but his boyfriend..HES REALLY GAY!

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What do you say to a cashier? How much is it?

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A disabled man walked into a- That can't be right

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roses are blue violets are red i messed up so f... this s..t

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A man is in prison and one day his cellmate offers to help him escape. The cellmate tells the man to quickly hide under the covers on his bed and that he'll instruct him further once the security guard passes. The man is then raped. Savagely.

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Roses are Green Violets are Black Everything's different since I took crack

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my grandpa has the heart of a lion, and a permanent ban to the zoo.

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Yo mama so dumb that she got mediocre grades throughout highschool and college which explains her less than desirable financial situation

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What's red and checkered and tells you to turn your music down? Michael

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Where did susie go after the explosion? everywhere. What was susie after the explosion? a puzzle.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops