Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Who are you?

What's red and hurts your teeth. Answer: a brick

So a baby seal walks into a club

when life gives you lemons throw them away.. they are probably bad

What do you say to a rock? Meow

-What did the old lady have for dinner? -Dementia

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse replies, "My wife is dying of terminal brain cancer."

What's worse than having a worm in your apple? 2012.

Q.who is Tiny, a lion and has no friends and is a bald eagle? A.Rory Johnston

27

Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies on fire and a pile of living babies on fire? The dead babies are usually not as loud.

What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

What's black, white, and red all over? Many different things are black, white, and red; to list just one would be an unfair judgment of things containing these three colors.

Knock Knock.. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Daves dead. This is Darrell.

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks him what he would like. The man says,"I'm feeling light today so I'll just have some H2O." The man's friend says,"I'm feeling the same. I'll have some H2O, too." The second man died.

I saw a shooting star. It shot me.

What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: He has a debilitating disease, it's called ALS.

what did the black guy get from churches chicken? fried chicken.

So one time there was this woman learning...

A pregnant woman walks into a bar and miscarries.

Why did the fisherman go to Alaska? The commercial fishing business is strong there and it was a sound financial decision.

roses are red violets are blue i done you mom a favor by making you...banana and rice don't worry it'll taste just nice

Whats funnier than a dead baby?... a dead baby dressed as a clown whats funnier than that?... A pile of dead babies dreesed as clowns Whats funnier than that?... that the baby in the bottom of the pile is alive.

Person 1: Why don't you want to date me? Person 2: Because you are ugly Person 1: Why am I ugly? Person 2: Because you have bad features. Person 1: Why do i have bad features? Person 2: It's your genetics. Person 1: Why is it my genetics Person 2: Cuz that's the way god made you Person 1: Why? Person 2: Because god's god made you Person 1: Why Person 2: Because the god of god of god made you Person 1: Why? Person 2: That's the way the god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of (GOES ON FOREVER!!!) made you.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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