Four blonds are driving to Disneyworld. They finally get to Florida and they see a sign that says "Disneyworld: left" so they take the left and get hit by a semi and all die.

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knock knock who's there the police you're under arrest for the kidnapping, and murder of 12 girls you have the right to remain silent anything you say or do can and will be used against you in the court of law

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An astronaut, a nun and a fireman walk into a bar. They all order something to drink as they have all had a busy day.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the water? A: Shark bait.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken had just received a call from his family, hearing that his father had just been butchered. He was approaching the farm when an 18-wheeler approached. The tire flew off, hit a candy store, candy flew in the chicken's mouth, and it died of diabetes. However, right before the chicken died he finally crossed the road, not knowing he would get shot by his farmer. The chicken managed to survive the shooting to his right kidney, wiggled to his family, and died in front of his wife.

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A wise man once said a journey of a thousand steps starts with one step. The wise man also smoked weed and starved to death in a cave.

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why girl die cancer

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Why did the man fall off of his bike? He was hit by a car and died in a tragic accident.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was a chicken and was probably not aware that it was walking across a road at all, especially considering that it was likely in a low-traffic rural area.

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What's as hard as a rock? A rock

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Roses are red, violets are blue. Your definitely a virgin, too bad your mom isn't too.

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A hard-working man, in his early forties with slightly graying hair, arrives to work earlier every day. He values integrity and dedication. His loving wife is proud of his accomplishments and her favorite part of the day is when he arrives home from a day at the office. He is close friends with the Director of HR, because he believes that we all should be respected and treated fairly on the job. Today, there is a board meeting, which he prepared for extensively, because he cares deeply about what happens to this great company. His boss greets him after the meeting is done and says, "Great job, that presentation was even better than yours usually are." It was a very long meeting, so they both end up going to the Men's Room. What does he say when his boss corners him near the urinals and demands sex? Nothing. He doesn't like to talk during sex.

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What was black, then white, now dead all over? Michael Jackson.

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A man walks into a bar. Because he's had a rough day, he asks the barender for a drink. Then another... Then another... (continued) The man walks out of the bar and goes to his car. He starts to drive back to his house. He wobbly makes turns and closes his eyes every 5 seconds or so. He also talks to his boss on his phone for the majority of the ride. Surprisingly enough, he makes it home safely and doesn't harm anyone else despite the large amount he had to drink. He stumbles into his apartment and goes up to his room. He slumps down onto his bed on his back very heavily, causing the room to shake a bit. He opens his eyes, only to find his glass shandelier falling from directly above his face. His body was found by his girlfriend the next morning. I guess there's no real moral to the story then... Maybe it's: You can drink and drive, but don't put a shandelier directly above your bed... I guess? Wow. What are the odds?

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What did the black man say to his wife? Nothing, she had died earlier that year after a long battle with cancer.

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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Aww Eliza, thanks for being around in spirit, dont leave yet, I am kinda having breathing problems, and Alice says my something levels are dropping because I need solid food, please dont leave, I cant tell time even with a watch, but would you mind waiting a bit? Ill eat fast, somehow.

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What do you call it when a blonde jumps off the Empire State Building without a parachute? Suicide.

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womens rights

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Once upon time the government was corrupt Jk, it always has been

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What's worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings What's worse than 2 bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? 3 bee stings.

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A:knock, knock B:who's there A:come in B:come in who A:me I'm gay

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What do you do when a blonde throws a grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back at her

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Is that my bread? I sure hope so.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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