why cant little timmy ski? he was born without legs.

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What did Jesus say as he walked on water and people went like WOHOO! OMG WE ARE TOTALLY GOING TO CHISEL THIS INTO JEWTUBE SO EVERYONE CAN SEE! "BEHOLD AS I WALK UPON THIS WATER WHILE ALL OF YOU HAVE FAILED BEFORE ME! ONLY I CAN WALK OF THIS WATER OF FROZEN WITHOUT SLIPPING! Nero: Because go fuck yourself asshole. Lol... Jewtube was not as widely available as youtube so yeah... Walking on ice without falling over was a big thing back then... You know such as OMG! EATING BREAD AND DRINKING WINE! WOOOOOOAAAAH SCIENCE! AND BURNING BUSHES SPOKE AND... Moral: "Ill be back, you know, just to annoy you, and because I want to, a real man needs no other reason, and that is why you fuckers need so many of them"

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a horse walks into an abandoned lighthouse , the lighthouse keeper is angered by this and ushers the horse to leave but the horse gets startled and kicks the mans bookshelf over before galloping away

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Roses are red Violets are blue I don't like rhymes Penis

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all the kids had fun

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What happens when you divide by 0? Sadly, you don't.

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Q: What did Mr. Spoke say when Captain Kirk was raping him? A: "Ouch! Ouch! Captain, this is so illogical!"

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I don't know about the rest of you, but I HATE funerals.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was a serial killer.

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if dragonflies have purple toe nails, then how many pancakes does it take to build a doghouse? canada, because snakes don't have armpits!

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what did mohammed say to Jesus? nothing they lived in completly different time periods

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What's the difference between a leopard and a coffee table? There is no difference. They both have four legs.

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Johnny has 32 cookies. He eats 28 of them. What does he have now? Diabetes, Johnny has diabetes.

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How do chinese people call the firemen? By phone.

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Why did the man pee his pants? Because he was paralyzed from the waist down and had no way of feeling

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What's better than eating an orange? Anal sex with Kim Kardashian.

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What's faster, a train or a bike? A horse because a cow gives milk

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1,000 people get out of a plane , who hits the ground first? The DEAD guy!!!!

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A man rode into town on Friday and came out on Friday how did he manage this? He stayed for a couple of hours

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A man walk to the store and buys some clothes.

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What happened to the boat that sank? Everyone on it died

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what is big white and hurts when it falls on you out of tree? A refrigerator

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Roses Are Red , Violets Are Blue , Go Die .

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"Hey! Did you get a haircut?" "No, I just started chemo..."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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