I found someone on the ground who wasn't breathing and had no pulse.They must have been in a damn deep sleep.

what do you call cheese that is not yours? stolen property

Q: What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Chrismas? A: Cancer

What's worse than getting arrested? getting arrested on your birthday.

What was the prostitute's favorite number? 68

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? Go ask your mom.

Why did the boy fall off the sky scraper. It was hit by an axe.

What's invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit farts.

WHART++EWEEEEEEEP FLARPEN CARPEN FLARP

"Aids" "What?" "Yup, you just got aids­­­."

How do you get birds to land in your back yard? With a gun.

What color is the orange? Grey, I'm color blind.

Q. Whats worse than 9 babies in 1 suitcase? A. 1 baby in 9 suitcases.

Why did the retarded man fail his math test? He didn't study.

Manchester City

Why did Mexico enter the war? Because they were bombed.

A black man, a jewish man and an asian man walk into a bar. They are attending the wake of a friend who died of cancer.

Chuck Norris is dead......

What's more painful than having your girlfriend cheat on you and leave you? Having your **** bitten off slowly.

How can you tell if your wife is dead? The sex is the same but the dishes pile up.

A child wasn't wearing knee pads when he was skateboarding. He proceeded to fall of his board and break his arm

whats worse than being payton johnson being black

Your momma's so dumb she graduated high school with a C average.

Why did Ben Franklin Invent Bifocals? He's a jive turkey.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...