What happens when a girl sticks her head in a birthday cake? She gets a toothpick stuck in her eyebrow. Trust me..I know.

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A horse walked into a bar. The bartender said "why the long face?" The horse then panicked, and feeling threatened, it kicked the bartender with its hind legs and galloped out of the bar. A civilian took immediate control of the situation and dialed the number for animal control, who arrived shortly and tranquilized the deer and put it back in its natural habitat. Don't worry, that didn't actually happen

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A teenage boy is getting ready to take his girlfriend to prom. First he goes to get a tux but there's a long tux line at the shop and it takes forever. Next, he hast to get some flowers so he goes to a florist and there is a huge flower line there. It takes forever but he gets the flowers. Next he heads to get a limo, unfortunately there is a long limo line at the rental office and it takes a long time but he gets the job done. Finally the day of the prom comes and the two are dancing happily and are having a good time. When the song is over she asks him to get her some punch, so he heads over to the punch table and there is no punchline.

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Do you know what's impossible? A chink whos not smart.

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My momma's so ugly she had to get plastic surgery. Now I need it.

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Why didn't Sarah come to school today? She had a heart attack and died.

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Tim likes girls

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot you racist.

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knock knock whos there? steve oh hi steve please come in

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person one: ask me if im a carrot person two: are you a carrot? person one: nope (the walks away)

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What would Muhammed do?

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why did the homosexual man cross the road? to get to his gay partner.

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Where do bees go to the bathroom? In the hive - they're incontinent.

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Why did the Jewish cross the road? He didn't he died in Holocaust.

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A:Wanna hear a joke? B: Sure A: A joke

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A man walks into a bar an orders a few pints. He then goes home and brutally rapes his wife and chains his staring kids to a fencepost in the backyard along with their deceased dog named Spot.

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Jesus walks into a church only to be touched inappropriately.

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What is 1 inch long and eats everyone in it's way .... my pet fish

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what's black? a lot of things.

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What did the bartender say to the fat guy? Hi

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Whats the most impotent thing to remember when your going skateboarding? A skateboard.

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What did the rabbi say at the party? Mazel Tov.

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Why did the duck cross road? It didn't, it got ran over.

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What did Batman say to Superman before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops