Q:Why did Hitler lose World War II? A:His "gas" bill.

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Boy: Knock Knock. Man: Who's there? Boy: Doctor. Man: Doctor Who? Boy: Haha! The man then invites the boy into his home, where he gives him a glass of lemonade laced with Ruphalyn. He then proceeds to take off the boy's clothes and rape him. When the boy awakes, the man starts to fear for the police discovering the boy in his home, so he kills the boy and cuts off his limbs and head, and buries the body parts in a hole in his backyard.

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what did one sandwich say to another sandwich? nothing, sandwiches cant talk

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How many dead babies does it take to fill a bathtub? It is highly unlikely one would have a supply of dead babies large enough to answer this question.

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How do you kill a red elephant? You can't red elephants don't exist.

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In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. ;)

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What do call a man with no arms or no legs that sits on the couch? Grandpa after his amputations.

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How many lemurs does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them.

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I'm Andrew Schmitt

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because I pushed him.

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why was the girl screaming? She was getting raped from behind by her dad.

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Two tomatoes were crossing a road when one of them got hit by a truck. The other said, Carrot.

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What's worst than missing a doctors appointment? Having AIDS and missng out on getting a cure that could have gotten rid of your disease.

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What's worst than a holocaust 2 holocaust's

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why did the guy get pulled over he had a broken tail light

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist.

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How many skilled union workers does it take to change a light bulb? One.

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Why did the black man eat KFC? Because he got hungry.

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knock knock whos there ben ben who ben ages since i seen you !!! vote this up please or a unicorn will die , unicorns are not real , but a moth can ride bikes so please vote this down

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Why did the kid drop his ice cream? Because he was laughing so hard at the man who farted and burped at the same time.

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why did suzy get hit by the bus because she got dumped into the road and she had no legs

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An alien spacecraft picks up human transmissions from Earth. They continue on in silence and disgust.

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Why was the black man hanging from the tree? He fell and had to grab a branch.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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