What do you call a black man on a rope swing? Usually whatever his first name is, but if he goes by a nickname you should use that

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What has hands but isn't alive? A dead person.

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I got put through anger management when I was a child it made me mad.

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What's worse then 10 babies nailed to 10 trees? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees

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What did the white male say to the black male who had just robbed a bank? I'm glad you have a reliable source of income to feed yourself and your family

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I went up to my friend and she said to me, "Foop." I calmly went to the nearest teacher and told her that Susie is having a mental breakdown again

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What did the paper say to the pen? Nothing, they are inanimate objects!

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Why did the man wipe his bum with a sweat-shirt? Because they were all out of toilet paper

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there once was a little boy who lived in a little house with his little parents who ate little food. one day the boy went on a website called antijokes and he started to read a joke, by the time he had gotten to the end of the joke he realized that there was no punchline but it was very lenghty and quite pointless.

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A fat man orders a pizza. Then after eating it, he gets a eart attack due to his high cholesterol and lack of exercise

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My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well, I was amazed, I never knew they worked

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roses are red violets are blue clean up that **** or no sex 4 u

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What do you call a woman when you're inside her? Mom.

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Your dads so fat he needs to go on a diet

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Magic! Well not really, you see, people that are stressed have the tendency to remain far longer into the state of hypnosis because their body conciously and subconciously (I am typoing it, but I cant bother to type it correctly fuck it) seek out the state of peace that hypnosis gives more often. Anyway, I know another thing that helps relieve stress, cough... Now, did you know that if you push your nose upwards slightly, you will feel a finger between your legs? its because nerve endings are connected that way, give it a go.

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What did the chair say to the guy? Nothing, as it is a chair and chairs can't talk

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Did you hear the joke about the deaf guy ? He didn't.

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Two fish are in a tank. The first one says, "How the heck do I drive this thing!".

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Why couldn't the T-Rex give anyone a high five? Cuz he's dead.

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Why did the girl cry? She got hit by a bus.

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do you know what was a good idea? not last night

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why did the boy drop his ice cream? a terrorist dropped a bomb on him which turned into a transformer, raped him and then burried him inside of his refridgerator

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knock knock. whos there? the police. we have news about your daughter. She has been tortured and raped and you will never see her again for the man that took her has taken her out of our jurisdiction.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office, naked but wrapped in Saran Wrap. The Doctor takes one look at him and says, "I can clearly see your nuts."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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