When writing haikus Sometimes, I miscount the syllables See, that line has eight.

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How do you tickle a tree? you dont you are a schizo stop kicking leaves

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Do you know what God said to Hitler as he approached the gate of heaven? ??????????????????

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whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a red corvette? i don't have a red corvette in my garage

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Why did the woman have no boobs? Breast cancer

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what's worse than stubbing your toe? 9/11

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Why does pavement get hot. Because it’s black. How could you tell she had bruises. Because they were black. Why did the boy drop out of school. Because he was dying of melanoma.

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What's white and yellow with red all over? Vietnam War

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If pro is the oppisite of con what is the oppiste of progress Congress

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A wise man once said a journey of a thousand steps starts with one step. The wise man also smoked weed and starved to death in a cave.

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why girl die cancer

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Roses are red, violets are blue. Your definitely a virgin, too bad your mom isn't too.

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A hard-working man, in his early forties with slightly graying hair, arrives to work earlier every day. He values integrity and dedication. His loving wife is proud of his accomplishments and her favorite part of the day is when he arrives home from a day at the office. He is close friends with the Director of HR, because he believes that we all should be respected and treated fairly on the job. Today, there is a board meeting, which he prepared for extensively, because he cares deeply about what happens to this great company. His boss greets him after the meeting is done and says, "Great job, that presentation was even better than yours usually are." It was a very long meeting, so they both end up going to the Men's Room. What does he say when his boss corners him near the urinals and demands sex? Nothing. He doesn't like to talk during sex.

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Why was the 15 year old boy always alone in his bedroom making strange noises? Because he was struggling to fight back the tears following his single mother's recent suicide, driven by her despair over the reality that her son was an out of control drug addict, just like his no-good father who ran out on them.

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Why did the man fall off of his bike? He was hit by a car and died in a tragic accident.

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What's as hard as a rock? A rock

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A man walks into a bar. Because he's had a rough day, he asks the barender for a drink. Then another... Then another... (continued) The man walks out of the bar and goes to his car. He starts to drive back to his house. He wobbly makes turns and closes his eyes every 5 seconds or so. He also talks to his boss on his phone for the majority of the ride. Surprisingly enough, he makes it home safely and doesn't harm anyone else despite the large amount he had to drink. He stumbles into his apartment and goes up to his room. He slumps down onto his bed on his back very heavily, causing the room to shake a bit. He opens his eyes, only to find his glass shandelier falling from directly above his face. His body was found by his girlfriend the next morning. I guess there's no real moral to the story then... Maybe it's: You can drink and drive, but don't put a shandelier directly above your bed... I guess? Wow. What are the odds?

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What was black, then white, now dead all over? Michael Jackson.

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What did the black man say to his wife? Nothing, she had died earlier that year after a long battle with cancer.

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Is that my bread? I sure hope so.

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Once upon time the government was corrupt Jk, it always has been

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you just read an anti-joke

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What do you call it when a blonde jumps off the Empire State Building without a parachute? Suicide.

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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