I don't often drink beer, but when I do, I make the poor decision to attempt to drive while intoxicated, kill a pedestrian, and end up in jail with a hangover, a DUI, and an account of vehicular homicide. Don't drink and drive simultaneously.

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Say this to someone: On a scale from one to ten, what is your favorite color?

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A: knock knock B: who's there A:come in B:come in who?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he is a chicken and is not intelligent enough to know that he is about to be hit by a bus while hopelessly searching for food under an elderly man's nose.

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What's better than winning a gold at the paralympic Walking

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A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

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Roses are red Violets are violet Why does it go like that anyways? ~Yasmin~

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some magicians can walk on water, Chuck norris can swim in water, faster than the average man.

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roses are red violets are blue cover me im goin in

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme Others just don't

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Why couldn't people tell the difference between the two twins? Because they were indentical.

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edmond alward. handyman services. call 0858430803.

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Q. How do you kill 5000 flies? A. Slap a afraican in the face.

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Q: What is scarier than the boogie man? A: Herpes

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A black guy and a white guy both interview for a job. The black guy gets the job because he is college educated and highly qualified.

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Who do you call when there is a ghost in your house? You should problably call the doctor, you may be hallucinating.

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why did the little girl fell off the bed? because she saw his father rape her sister after killing his mother years ago, and every time she goes to sleep, she remembers that and the images come back to haunt her

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Why was six afraid of seven? Back when seven was in Vietnam, he sufferd Posttraumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and constantly has flash backs and irrational thoughts of six being with the veitnamese alliance and tries to viciously molest six whenever he runs out of anxiety medication.

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What's big, black, and just knocked an 8 year old girl off of her bike? The refrigerator I just threw at her. (not all are white you know)

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Why isnt there a womens NASCAR? Because NASCAR does not yet have the funding to start a women's league.

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Q: What did a rock say to a Another Rock? A: Don't take things for Granite!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I told him to. I'm very influential.

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what did the doctor say to the wery fat man? you have diabetes

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A man walks into a bar. He has a serious drinking problem and is destroying his life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops