A plane filled with English tourists is on it's way from Holland to Spain. It crashes in France. Where are the surviors buried? Survivors aren't buried.

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle

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So I went to an audition, my friend said "break a leg" And then I did

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What happened to the little boy that went to The Penn State locker room? He had a great day meeting the team and watching the football game.

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A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all on a deserted island with no food or water. The redhead decides to try and swim to safety, but after a few hours of swimming she becomes to tired to carry on and drowns. After knowing their friend died, the two other women decide that swimming is not a viable option for rescue, so they decide to stay on the island. A few days later a search party rescues them.

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Whats worse than getting raped by jack the ripper? Getting fingered by captain hook.

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What did the black man in a white van get when he went over the speed limit? A speeding ticket

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Whats worse than pulling down a girls pants and seeing a giant furry bush... finding out her vagina has teeth in it.

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How do you make a clown cry? Kill his family

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Where did Officer Blackman find the missing child? A shallow grave.

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What do you call a magic MAAAAAAAAAAAN? A magic man

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What's the best way to win a race? Run faster than all other participants.

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How many Druggies does it take to make toast. One.

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Raveena Thandhan

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Why was Rodney afraid of Chung Lee? Because Chung Lee is an intimidating person, capable of literally ripping your face off.

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what's worse than the holocaust? when starbucks puts whip cream in my hot chocolate and I didn't ask for it. created by KA

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What do you call a black guy that feeds children? A waiter

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A man jumped off a cliff. He died.

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how do people without arms and legs have sex? no one has sex with people without arms and legs.

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What can be said about a high school drop out who is 30, lives with his mom, and plays WoW all day? He is probably a very high level mage

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How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans.

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has anybody else just skipped to the short ones

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how many birds did chuck norris kill with one stone? one.

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You have now entered Automatic Breathing Mode

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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