how do you drowned a blonde? put ankle weights on her and throw her in a river.

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Why was Little Bobby sad? He just superglued Uranus to his forehead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was trying to commit suicide through vehicular manslaughter and knew that the average human being would not be able to stop before it was too late.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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what happend to the kid standing on a railway, he got hit by a train

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Why was the dinosaur laughing so hard? He heard a very humorous joke

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What's worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings. What's worse than 2 bee stings? A Holocaust. What's worse than a Holocaust? 3 bee stings.

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Q: what is green and looks like grass. A: fake grass

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A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The Mexican; the black man had too much alcohol and the Mexican was the designated driver.

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Whats Funnier than a clown? Woman's Basketball.

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what do you call a blind man who buys a caller i.d.? handicapped

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What do you get when you take a bag of chips and divide it by 5? a Nike store worker's meal

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Where do cows go when they're bored? Wherever they're standing. Cows cannot use toilets, regardless of their mood.

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Me John Kasich! Me win Ohio primary!

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What's a worse place to be besides the friendzone? On your grandmas lap crying because your parents just died in a car crash.

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Why doesn't my mom make dinner anymore? she died in a fire on my birthday.

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What will ur wife say when she finds you in bed with a hore-s.

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why did the boy drop his ice cream? he had no hands

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What happened to the little boy who threw a spitball at the teacher? He was killed the next day when the teacher, who had a history of mental instability and schizophrenia, decided to go on a shooting rampage in class.

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Why didn't Susie's dad come home on time? He was dragged into a dark alley, then stabbed in the eye. When his body was found 2 days later, Susie couldnt stand the loss and hung herself the day after her father was found.

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A dog walks into a forest and sees a whale. The dog asks "aren't you supposed to be in the ocean?" The whale replies, "yes."

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How do you punish Helen Keller You don't, she's dead

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What was even more disgusting than the holocaust? Lucy's new shoes.

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A blonde, a brunette and a red-head find a mirror with a message on it that says "Stand in front of the mirror and say something you think is true. If it is true, I'll grant you a wish. If it is wrong, you'll be sucked inside the mirror and be trapped there forever." The blonde, who is standing in front of the mirror, says "I think this is a stupid joke." and nothing happened.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops