Person 1: Why don't you want to date me? Person 2: Because you are ugly Person 1: Why am I ugly? Person 2: Because you have bad features. Person 1: Why do i have bad features? Person 2: It's your genetics. Person 1: Why is it my genetics Person 2: Cuz that's the way god made you Person 1: Why? Person 2: Because god's god made you Person 1: Why Person 2: Because the god of god of god made you Person 1: Why? Person 2: That's the way the god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of (GOES ON FOREVER!!!) made you.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why couldn't the blonde write the number eleven? She was paralyzed.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

what do trees like to drink? r o o t b e a r

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What has 4 legs and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you a pool table

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the KFC man was chasing him.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why didn't the woman cross the road? She died from breast cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A man with glasses and a cane walks out if a clothing store and accidentally bumps into a woman, knocking his hat off "Can't you watch where you're going?" the woman asks. The man then slaps her, knocking her to the ground. He picks up his new designer fedora, and drives off in his $90,000 Cadillac. The woman, after dusting herself off, gets the guy's plates, convinces a few witnesses to testify against the man, and informs the authorities of an assault. He was later arrested for assault as well as pimping and soliciting sex. He is found guilty in a court of law and is sentenced to 2-5 years in prison, and is doled a hefty fine.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the black man say to the jew and the blonde girl as they walked to the car. Shotgun.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: IMAGINE that your in a heart racing battle with a huge grizzly bear when suddenly a bird picks you up and carries you to china and leaves you on the adge of a cliff which then you are chased by warriors and are forced to jump off the edge. What do you do? A: Wake up

thumb_up thumb_down -8

One man was interested in purchasing poultry. He found it was as very wise investment in that he enjoyed the resulting pleasure immensely.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Opinions are like assholes. I'm not sure how they are alike, but that seems to be the general consensus.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's worse than dividing by zero? Chuck Norris dividing your face!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

An SQL query walks into a bar, sees two tables and asks if it can join them.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Jack, John, Justin, Joseph and Jimmy walk into a bar. They order a pint of beer and start wondering what their names have in common.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q- what's the difference between a trampoline and a baby? A- you take of your shoes to jump on a trampoline

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why was the 3 year old high He was flying

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? This year I'm going to win the golden brief case!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you give a man who has everything? Syphilis

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Roses are red Violets are blue Violets are actually purple or white

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpion

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: What do the Terms of Service say? A: I dont know, I didnt read them.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting stabbed.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did Emily sit in a lonely corner? Because she just wanted to okay!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops