roses are red , thankyou for stating that , i can now continue with gardening as it is my profession.

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What's worse than 10 babies stapled to a tree? The Holocaust.

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A boy got a dog for his Birthday. The dog would have said happy Birthday but dogs can't speak.

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What's the answer to all your problems The answer

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What does and elephant and me have in common. Everything, I am an elephant.

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What do you call a man who interru- SHUT UP!

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A:how many notzies dose it change a light bulb B:none they made the jewish do it. :(

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Why did the jew go into the gas chamber? Because he thought he was going to get a shower.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Your roommate, I forgot my keys.

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Why did the Jewish man bend down to pick up a penny? Because he had dropped it and required the penny as part of his payment for his food.

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Why do women have boobs? In order to feed their infants

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called anti joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

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Why did Suzy fall of the swing? Cuz she had no arms! B I T C H

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What do blueberries, oranges, watermelons, doors, curtains, backpacks, spoons, asian men, bicycles, asian men on bicycles, shrimp, books, eagles, dinosaurs, watermelons wearing backpacks filled with shrimp and orange spoons, feet, limes, binders, paper, candles, chicken nuggets, tvs, chairs, floors, refridgerators, and humidifiers have in common? Barnes and Noble

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What did one Platypus say to the other Platypus? Nothing, Platypuses can't talk. However, they are the only mammal to lay eggs.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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whats the difference between an iron and a priest? An iron is a hand-held device which presses clothes and a priest is a person who is authorized to perform the sacred rituals of a religion.

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Well, I'm naked so I'm going to go.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, why am i even talking to you?

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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Wife: Does this make me look fat? Husband: Honey, your already fat.

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I'm Ryan Dunn, and this is a 120mph car crash

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What did the racist say to the other racist? Hey how was yesterday's clan meeting?

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:)Knock, Knock :(Who's there? :)Barbie :(Barbie who? :)Barbieq

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops