A man builds a time machine but can only travel back in time. Where does he go? Irrelevant. Time and space exist on different planes.

A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He orders a drink without making any grammatical errors.

Q:What did the scissors say to the paper? A: Nothing, cause thier scissors and paper they don't talk..

Yes or No? You're wrong because it was both.

What did the feminist say to the CIS white male? I respect you as a person.

Did you hear about the guys who were going to France? Well they are not going anymore.

What did the wife get her husband after he became a paraplegic in a car accident? Divorce papers.

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Why did the stoner cross the road? He didn't. He was stoned

Why did Jimmy get off of the park bench? he wanted candy from the man in the white van

Q: What kind of bees make milk? A: None. Bees make honey, not milk.

What do a squirrel and a cigarette have in common? -They are both perfectly harmless until you stick them in your mouth and light them on fire.

What do you call a Mexican guy in America? A Mexican American

Why don't you see elephants find in trees? Because most trees can't hold an elephants weight.

A man walks into a bar. Something funny happens.

Roses are brown, Violets are brown, WHO THE HELL $#!T IN MY GARDEN?!

Why did the weird alien jump everywhere? You probably don't want to know. If you learned why it jumped everywhere,you probably would make fun of it. I don't know if you know this, but aliens are sensitive. If you made fun of him, you probably would create World War 3:Humans VS Aliens.

Why did the kids put pirahnas in Mr. Hermann's fish tank? So they could eat him.

Enough with the gay jokes, they all go one direction.

Ask me if I'm an orange. Are you an orange? Nope! I'm a person! - SMC Digital

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Playing hide and seek with Dennis Ferguson

Knock knock How is ? Bond ,James Bond!

What do you get when you cross Justin Bieber with a chicken? Most likely some kind of singing human-chicken monster, although given the little research done on cross-species splicing, this is a highly improbable circumstance.

Why was't the Elephant allowed on the Airplane? He didn't have a boarding pass

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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