Why did the gay guy come out of the closet? He finally found the shirt he was looking for

A: why do elephants paint their toenails red? B: why? A: so they can hide in cherry trees B: I don't get it A: have you ever seen an elephant in a cherry tree? B: no... A: exactly

What's the opposite of Christopher Reeves? Reeves Christopher

How do you stop a bus? You press the brake pedal, causing the brake pads to squeeze the tires. Which will slow the momentum of the bus to the point of stopping.

How many people were trampled on Black Friday this year? Not enough.

What has 156 bras and 927 pairs of underwear? Someone without a washing machine.

A vegetarian walked into a butcher Luckily he realized where he was and walked out!

Why'd The Chicken Cross The Road? He Crossed The Road To Stand In An Icecream Line , Where A Little Boy Stood Infront Of Him, The Chicken Was Scared To Cross The Road Again To Get To The Other Side Because He Saw The Little Boy Get Hit By A Bus. So The Chicken Decided The Best Thing To Do Was To Sit Under A Tree , Where A Big White Thing Fell On Him , It Was A Fridge, Once The Fridge Hit The Ground Mexicans Ran Out And Then Explained To There Local Chickens What Crossing The Street Can Cause Them. To Be Dead. Moral: Dont Let A Chicken Cross The Road. :)

person 1: wanna hear a knock knock joke? Person 2: sure! Person 1: okay you start person 2: knock knock Person 1: who's there?

Q. What do you get when you cross a man, a bear and a pig? A. ManBearPig

A man walks into a library looking for books on poor punchlines. The Librarian directs him to the appropriate section.

Knock knock Whos there? The Gestapo

A chicken walked into the bar...

One Zebra and One Elephant was walking in the desert, the Zebra said its hot and the elephant said i know.

Whats the hardest part of eating a vegetable? The wheelchair.

What's worse than farting in front of your boyfriend? Farting on your boyfriends pillow and giving him pink eye.

What is the difference between a feminist and a gun? A gun only has one trigger

Who needs god when coffee is cheaper

What is both bold and brash? Fox

What did the little black boy get for Christmas? Hopefully something nice.

What did the Dildo say to the banana? Nothing, unless you're high on acid.

What do you get when you cross a Lion and a Shark? You would likely get trouble, seeing as its both animals are quite dangerous and crossing even one of them is ill advised.

Why did the black guy cross the road? Because he was late for a meeting

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks why the long face? The horse, unable to comprehend human speech, promptly craps on the floor and leaves.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...