Why did Wiggy fall into the toilet? Wiggy was the name of his turd.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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You know you have no friends when you steal someone's ALIAS concept and disrespect what is perhaps the most intellectually satisfying form of humour. [L]

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Why is six afraid of seven? Six isn't actually afraid of seven. It is true that seven devoured nine's carcass, but one has to understand that cannibalism is not a taboo in their culture. In the world of cardinal numbers, protein is precious and leaving corpses to rot is dangerously unsanitary. You should not judge them by the standards of human society. It's ignorant and offensive.

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knowck knowck whos there? shea shea who? shea...duh!

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Whats black on top and white on bottom? Rape.

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Adeeeellllleeeee where are my shorts

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Q: What's worse than a baby nailed to a tree? A: Ten babies nailed to eleven trees.

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Why didn't Susan go to school on show-and-tell day? Because she's dead.

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Bison: I just dont feel like having bread for breakfast again Sagat: You want some... Cornflakes? Bison: Ohohoh Ahahaha! Sagat: You like it? Bison: THIS IS DELICIOUS! Balrog: :( What about those tapes I made for you? You want me to...:( Bison: Balrog, shut up.

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Kumquats Daffodils Alka-Seltzer Serendipity Dewey Decimal System Buccaneer Avuncular Pantaloons Weasels Alligator Chewbacca Sasquatch

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What did the white guy say to the Mexican guy? Nothing he realize that the Mexican guy probably didn't speak English and he couldn't speak Spanish so conversing with this man would have been pointless.

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Who has lots of friends, but smells like urinate feceas? Smelly McD, I lied about the friends.

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a dog and a duck went out for a meal they both ordered lobster and enjoyed the night.

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I spilled spot remover on my dog, now hes gone.

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Why was the giant centipede full? Because it just ate half a dozen purebred golden retriever puppies by hiding all day in the poopy newspapers and emerging at night to eat the defenseless baby dogs in their sleep. BUM BUM BUM KSSSH!

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What is red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? reading posts on this website that arent antijokes. Seriously poeople... you cant just say something that random than put something tragic. it has to be funny and tragic.

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What did Robert Kardashian say at O.J.'s most recent trial? Nothing. He died of esophagal cancer

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How do you get a person to stop talking to you? Ask nicely to please be quiet and let me talk.

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Children + my basement + my finger = yes

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What did the woman say to the man before she had sex with him? "May I have sex with you, please?"

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What was the only animal to not board the ark in pairs? Loads of animals because it didn't happen.

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What happened when the chicken got to the other side of the road? It didn't, it got hit by a car.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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