what do you call a man who go his head cut off in a car accident? dead.

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A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

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What do you call four black people in a car? A family road trip.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? To get to the other side!

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A momma tomato and a baby tomato are walking down the street, and the baby tomato starts to fall behind. The mother turns to it and says "hurry up."

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Ask me if im an Airplane. Are your Airplane? Hell yes

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q. why did the guy forget what he did at the paty last night? a. because he had short term memory loss

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why did the black guy cross the street? to get to the package store.

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Q: What did the bulbasaur say to the charmanderr?? A: bulbasaurrr

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Whats worse than finding a maggot in your apple? Getting Raped

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Q: How do you shoot blue flames from your hands? A: You start to duck and lean forward quickly before you fully reach to duck as you punch as hard as you can, a blue flame should come out as Japanese bullshit automatically spews out of your mouth. It should not take more than a try or two...

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So, a monkey walks ino a bar... I can't remember the rest of the joke, but your mother is a whore.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have AIDS, now so do you.

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this joke is funny so dont read the rest even though there is no rest

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Why did the skeleton cross the road? It didn't. Anyone who would believe that is a complete moron.

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how many dead babies can fit in a microwave? 3 1/2

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Whats the difference between and ? Blue custard

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Q: how many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: two, one to hold the ladder securely and the other to screw in the lightbulb.

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Two muffins are in an oven. They procede to bake at 325 degrees for thirty minutes.

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Q why did the kids make fun of timmy A because he was an android with al chunk of metal added accidentally where a real boys crotch would be. Bwilkster

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Knock knock. After 1 and a half minutes of waiting, Phil assumes his friend is not home, and promptly leaves.

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A black guy pulls into a KFC drive thru and orders some chicken. The cashier tells him that they are out of chicken, so the black goes to McDonald's instead.

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A man walks into a bar and says "Ouch!"

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A man walks into a bar. The other patrons suddenly start to run away screaming, because he had just been hit by a bus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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