what did Stan say to Dave? nothing, Dave died 500 years before Stan was born, thus he said nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Do you know why one side of the V formation that geese fly in is longer than the other? Because there's more geese on that side.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Yo momma is so ugly that shes been taking self acceptance classes for her very low self esteem which is only one of many side affects shes had from years of bad relationships and being told she was and infact still is horrifically ugly its a truly sad thing and being the child of her you should be ashamed that you have not worked to help raise her self esteem

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Dude, you were so drunk last night that you got in a terrible car accident, and now you are paralyzed from the waste down for life.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What smells like death and makes kids cry? Dead animal

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call Batman with a knife in his chest? Dead

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Roses are red violets are blue I'm sorry to say it but i hate you

thumb_up thumb_down +8

I helped build the town school. But when people see me, no one says "Hey, there's the guy that built the town school." I helped put out the flames, when the city was on fire. But when people see me they don't say "Hey, there's the hero that saved the city." But I have sex with one goat.... And people judge me justifiably asd having sex with goats is really disgusting and sticks in peoples minds.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Yo mammas so fat you know what, i think she might die!!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

life is like a box of chocolates........no it's not

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call a white guy? A caucasion man.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

why dont black people celebrate thanksgiving? kfc is closed on holidays

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How are Justin Bieber and Lady Gaga similar? They are both men except Justin Beiber

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How many dead babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Impossible, non-living organisms are incapable of moving and babies lack the brain capacity to understand how to screw in a light bulb.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

you got Lady Gaga, Taylor Swift, and Reese Witherspoon. Which do you think is more succesful

thumb_up thumb_down +8

whats black and white? Micheal Jackson. - Avery Vartanian

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did god say to Jesus. "Dude, she's not a virgin"

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How do you get rid of black elephants? Arrest it for being black.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what happens when y tell ur deff brother uve been sleeping with his wife..nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Choir.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did one Japanese man say to the other? I don't know, I don't speak Japanese.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A white man, a black man, and a Mexican board a plane. The white man watches the on-flight film. The black man watches the on-flight film. The Mexican also watches the on-flight film. At the end of a long flight, they leave the plane and go do whatever it is they planned to do at their destination.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Nero here, nice to see you guys again, now you know why my babbling has been excessive (and pissed at the comments below, but now that the pills are working I am calm) Anyway, yeah point Zero is my "world" now, and its been thriving under my values (something I feared would just work on paper, and if so such beliefs would all been for nothing) As for hero... Well insert something like "I am no hero, I just do what is right" or something cheesy, or... Well, thats what I do really... Since nobody uses this site Ill extend the time you "former followers" can chat, as I got some nice stuff to share, and might just share a bit before I pass away (nah, but I will sleep when tired), I got a lot to do tomorrow.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the pear say to the orange? Orange ya gonna say hi? What did the apple say to the banana? Nothing, apples can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops