Why'd the chicken cross the road? After losing its family, the chicken had became an adrenaline junkie and enjoyed the rush of doing such dangerous things. It subsequently became addicted to opium.

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I would have buttered my bread, but the pool was cold.

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It's all fun and games until you stop having fun

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While your reading this. A man is robbing your home and sodomizing your dog

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Your Mom!!!

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Q. What has four legs, but can't walk? A. A dog dying of a serious illness...

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Why did the hipster burn his tongue? He was in a terrible car crash in which the fuel tank exploded.

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A black man and a mexican are in a car, who's driving? Nobody, the car is parked while they look at a map for directions because doing that while you are driving would be very dangerous and could result in a collision.

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Knock knock? Who's there? Interupting Doctor? Interupting Doc... You have cancer

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Every human being has some kind of penis <3

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What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac over off a cliff? A Cadillac seats 5

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How do you feed 1000 people? Cook 1000 meals .

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Why was the drunk man arrested? he beat his wife and was sentenced too 3 months in federal prison

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What would Marylin Monroe be doing right now if she was alive? Clawing her way out of her coffin.

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a white guy a black guy and a hispanic guy walk into a bar.

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Why did the elephant not do 9/11? Because he drank a hispanic turtle.

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what do u call 2 puerto rician men playing basketball? won on won

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Two black males walk into the bar due to circumstances, one of them has to leave early to tend to his ill wife, and the other enjoys his night drinking and making small talk with new friends PS: the one above was wrong sorry :(

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Why did the chicken cross the road ? To achieve his goal on the other side of the road. Being a chicken he is not aware of the arm a fast traveling motor vehicle can bring to him.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? It needed excitement in its otherwise mundane lifestyle.

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How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? 0. There are no lights at Auschwitz.

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A man named Chuck walks into a bar. One of the patrons says, "Oh my god! You're Walker, Texas Ranger!" Chuck replies, "No, that's Chuck Norris. I'm Chuck Connors. I played the Rifleman." The man replies, "Wait, aren't you dead?"

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A man walks into a bar. Because he's had a rough day, he asks the barender for a drink. Then another... Then another... (continued) The man walks out of the bar and goes to his car. He starts to drive back to his house. He wobbly makes turns and closes his eyes every 5 seconds or so. He also talks to his boss on his phone for the majority of the ride. Surprisingly enough, he makes it home safely and doesn't harm anyone else despite the large amount he had to drink. He stumbles into his apartment and goes up to his room. He slumps down onto his bed on his back very heavily, causing the room to shake a bit. He opens his eyes, only to find his glass shandelier falling from directly above his face. His body was found by his girlfriend the next morning. I guess there's no real moral to the story then... Maybe it's: You can drink and drive, but don't put a shandelier directly above your bed... I guess? Wow. What are the odds?

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your mama so fat she should go see a doctor.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops