What do you call 100 black men at the bottom of the ocean? A scuba group because during these hot summer months they like to cool off and go scuba diving.

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What is the easiest method of making multiple women fall head over heels? Have a wingman help you raise a rope at the start of a women's running race.

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A terminte walks into a pub and ask is the bar tender here?

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What do you call a black person flying a plane? A pilot.

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Whats the saddest part about the sandy hook shooting? There were still bullets in the clip... Im going to hell by the way.

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what did the surfer do on his computer? browse the internet

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How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

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How do you get to the store, if your car is broken down? Steal a blind girls bike, she can't ride it anyway!

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Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

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Why are cats mammals? Because they are descended from primordial mammals in the distant past which are the common ancestors of all mammals.

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Q: Why did the dead baby cross the road??? A: It was stapled to the chicken.

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How do you get 500 babies into one bathtub? a blender. How do you get them out? NACHOOOS

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theres this guy that i REALLY like but today he was putting something in my locker, it was gumbie the little green bendy thing but i didnt want it to be in my locker so i slammed my locker, except the only thing was that his pinky was in the way!!!! oh gosh i felt soooooo bad!!!! turns out he went to the hostpital and got stitches!!!!!!! that made it worse on me!!!!!! he said he was finee but i still cant let that go!!!!!

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Why does the man hate his job? He thinks working sucks?

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The day after Christmas a chain-smoker, a sex addict, and an alcoholic go to the doctor. The doctor tells the three friends that they need to quit their addiction or they will die. R.I.P. Tommy, Jacob, and Winston 1/1/2011

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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Two Pigs are in a bath. One pig says to the other "pass me the soap", to which the other pig replies "Do I look like a typewriter?"

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Dad: Blind side was the black kid who played tight end. Me: Offensive line. Dad: Sorry, African American kid.

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Call jets pizza at 8637090999 and say porr cisero is still stuck and shit will go down

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lets bomb africa

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What looks like a flower, smells like a flower, and feels like a flower, but isn't a flower? Just kidding it's a flower

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: Depends on how hard you throw them.

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Two blondes walk into a bar, but they are then puzzled as the door would not budge open for them.

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Knock, knock who's there? Steve Evans. Steve Evans who? You've already forgotten me? We just met on Eharmony yesterday.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops