I may have Alzheimer's. But at least I don't have Alzheimer's.

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Who ate my sandwich? The office appliance that fell from the sky.

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Why did the gay kid drop his ice cream Because he got punched in the face.

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I told a priest that I would never believe in anything greater than myself. He said I had the God complex, that I was grandios. I stared him in the eye and asked, "how highly do you think of me? Thank you" and left.

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Why couldn't timmy brush his hair? He had leukaemia

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Knock Knock. GO AWAY!

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Why did Jane break up with DeShawn? Cause they grew apart

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Why is evan a lil poop? cause he pooped my poop all the pooping ;)

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Whats the best things about 25 year olds? Theres 20 of them.

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What do you call a vehicle has 56 wheels? Anything you want, because it hasn't been invented yet.

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. Everyone in the bar is very happy for him considering he has regained the ability to walk

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Q: why did the boy fall down when he was walking home? A: he was murdered.

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what is the difference between a a person and a book? people can walk

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What is Wonder Woman's drug of choice? Heroine.

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What do you call 100 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A weird kind of genocide.

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what's white and 10 inches? nothing....

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Doctor: I bring grave news. Your wife is dying. She won't survive for another 100 years. Concerned and anguished Husband: Oh... that's ok! Doctor: Oh did I say years? I meant days! Oh the mirth! *The doctor breaks down into hysterical laughter, which the Concerned and Anguished Husband is furious to see, as the Doctor is taking delight out of such a grave situation.

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Why was the blonde fired from the factory? Repeated absences and violation of company policy.

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What did the little boy get for christimas? Nothing because he's a selfish asshole.

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A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

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a man walks into a bar and was arrested because it wasn't a bar it was a bank and he shot and killed 4 people during the armed robbery

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just imagine like a whole dad no imagine like 1000 dads an army of dads ready to conquer

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Yo mums so fat she went on a diet.

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Q: What do you call a Chelsea fan on the moon? A: A Problem. Q: What do you call 100 Chelsea fans on the moon? A: An even bigger problem. Q: What do you call all the Chelsea fans on the moon? A: Problem solved hahaha Q: What would you get if Newcastle were relegated? A: 45,000 more Chelsea fans

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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