There once was a woman from Ealing, Who had a peculiar feeling She went to the doctors and was consequently diagnosed with Chlamydia

Why doesn't Helen Keller know how to drive? because she's a woman.

Q: How do you keep a blond occupied for an hour? A: You write "flip over" on both sides of a blank piece of paper.

Q: What did the boy say to the girl? A: Wanna go to homecoming?

Women's rights

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

I literally died laughing

Knock Knock Who's there? Interrupting cow Interrupting cow wh- SHUT UP!

A comedian walks onto the stage. Antehumor.

Why did the little boy fall down the steps? Because he wasn't a very stable person.

a man walks into a bar... he was then shot to death because he was a slave in the early 1800s

What's worse than the Holocaust? Very few things are worse than this international tragedy Over six million people died, most of them tortured before they died. But stepping on a thumb tack is way up there

Why did the chicken cross the road? To save his soon to be butchered family.

whats red and and has 202 legs? an ostrich, ok i lied about 200 legs and the red part

What did Robin say to Batman before they entered the Batmobile? "Batman, I'm a necropheliac."

Whats the difference between a loser and a winner there places

Knock Knock Whos there? Knock knock? Whos there? Knock knock. WHOS IS THERE?!?!? Knock Knock is, my name is Knock Knock.

Q: How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? A: They beat her.

Why did the boy trip? A small explosion in the center of the earth caused by a hobo created a tsunami, causes a seagull to fly off in alarm. The seagull lands on a Smart Car, causing it to crash, which sends a signal off to a satellite in space. Because of this, a massive earthquake occurs. Oh, and the boy? There was a bowl of soup left carelessly on the ground.

A dog walks into a bar and the bartender asks him "What can I get for you?" The dog replies "1 beer please." shocked at the dogs English the bartender sprints out of the bar in terror

Have you seen Helen Keller's house? Well, It's an old style ranch home in a respectable neighborhood.

One day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck. The truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car. He took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle. Furious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires. The blonde got angry and called the cops, who proceeded to come and arrest him.

"What would Jesus do?" "Form a religion, get nailed to a cross, and become a martyr to millions."

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? There are numerous things worse than finding a worm in your apple. Some include the holocaust and nuclear warfare

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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