Contrary to the popular saying, "An apple a day keeps the doctor away," if you get cancer there's nothing an apple can do...

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Knock Knock, Ow my face

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What did the girl say to her ex? Fuck you.

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Why does Mario grown on shrooms? Because they bloom inside of him.

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A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

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A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want first?" The man responds "Let's have the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance paid for everything." Shocked, the man asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being denied coverage. None of your future treatments will be covered."

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A janitor walks into a bar. He cleans the bar.

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What do you call a fish with no I's Animal cruelty

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How do you kill a retard? Give him a knife and say "who's special?"

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I SHOT SOMEBODY!!!! Said no stormtrooper ever.

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A guy walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The guy didn't respond because he was deaf.

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do you have a wife?

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A blind man walks into a book store. He asks if they have any books in Braille. The employee says "Yes! Many you haven't even seen before!"

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Poop

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knock knock no no you go now i clean

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How do you make Yoda sad? Kill all of his friends.

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Your momma is so fat, that she decided to sign up for weight-watchers, and is now on her way to a healthy life

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so...um, yeah

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Why was the blonde so dumb? She had a severe case of dyslexia, which made it difficult to study.

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Girlfriend: Hey, you know whats the cutest thing ever? COMIC SANS Stabs girlfriend in the eyes.

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I like Pi. It can make circles.

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how many jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? one................ standing on a pile of dead babies.

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What does an Irishman say to you in the morning? Nothing because you only speak French.

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Roses are red violets are blue I want to F%$# you with a rake

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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